The Story of Nymphadora Tonks and Remus Lupin
by Lalalupin
Summary: Story of Tonks and Lupin, how they got together during the Half Blood Prince Novel year. My fisrt fanfic, so please R&R! Expresses hardships, struggles and rewards of forbidden love. Set from both Tonks and Lupins points of view. Rated T for language, read at your own discretion
1. Chapter 1: Tonks

**Author's Note: Hello! This is my first fan-fiction, about how Tonks and Lupin got together in the books. Tonks and Lupin are my all time favourite characters, and that's why I decided to write this. Please read and review, it really makes my day, and I love getting feedback on my stories! **

**Thanks for reading, and enjoy!**

THE STORY OF NYMPHADORA TONKS AND REMUS LUPIN

CHAPTER 1

TONKS

Tonks was sitting at the long wooden table with the other members of the Order of the Phoenix. She was the youngest there, as she wasn't a member of the original order. Tonks sat between Remus Lupin and Molly Weasley.

"OK, Tonks, do you have anything to say?"

Tonks was snapped from her fantasies to reality. "Er- No, thank you," she said sheepishly, for everyone was staring at her, "I believe you've covered just about everything Alastor."

After the meeting, held, as always, in number 12 Grimmaud Place, Lupin approached her. Tonks's heart skipped a beat.

"Nymphadora-," Tonks interrupted.

"Do _NOT_ call me that!" she exclaimed furiously.

Lupin chuckled. "You, know, Tonks, that's what I've always admired about you."

"What?" Tonks asked haughtily.

"You prefer to be called Tonks; your surname, rather than Nymphadora, and people listen to you." he replied.

"Well, you would too if you had an idiot of a mother call you 'Nymphadora'!" she replied.

"May I continue now?" Lupin asked, trying to be as patient as possible," I'm worried about you. You always seem to be day dreaming and not paying attention, and, quite frankly, you have been so miserable lately!" Lupin spoke in a calm, friendly voice; as though he was worried he would hurt Tonks even more, "Your not yourself, Tonks, "he added, "and I've heard rumours that your patronus has changed into a wer- ."

Tonks cut him off, "It's changed into a big dog," she couldn't bear to look at him, "like Sirius." She added.

Tonks sighed. She knew she would have to admit her feelings for Lupin eventually. _"But not now,"_ she thought. _"The right time will come when I will have to express my love for him." _

"I'm… fine. I- I'm still just upset about….about Sirius's death." Tonks sighed and looked at her feet; she'd always been cunning, but found it difficult to lie to the person whom she secretly loved.

"I can understand you're upset, Tonks," Lupin said softly, taking one of her hands and putting it between both of his, "but I think there is also something else going on, but if you aren't ready to share it with us, then that is absolutely fine."

Lupin gave Tonks a small smile and released her hand, and then walked off to talk with Alastor Moody and Arthur Weasley.

For that short moment that Lupin had held her hand, Tonks's heart soared, but, once again, she was snapped back to reality when he released it. Disappointed, Tonks crossed the cold stone floor of the kitchen and decided to talk to Molly Weasley.

"Tonks, dear, are you alright?" Molly asked in a concerned tone, "You don't look very well; is it something Remus said?"

"No, no I'm absolutely fine, thank you Molly. I guess I'm still grieving o- over Sirius's death." Tonks sighed; it was getting so hard to talk to anyone, and she was afraid that someone would find out what was really going on.

"Tonks, you look ill," she added, "are you sure there isn't anything else wrong? You can tell me, you know. How about we go into the drawing room?" Molly asked kindly.

Tonks nodded. _"I guess I really should tell someone, and Molly is probably the best person I can tell," _she thought, _"but what would she say?"_ Tonks decided to find out, so she followed Molly to the drawing room obediently.

Tonks had forgotten how much time and effort everyone put into the room when they had first decided to make the house their head-quarters. The once extremely dirty room was now immaculate. Tonks scanned the room quickly; on one wall was the Black tapestry family tree, and there were also many family heirlooms scattered everywhere. Then there was the desk that used to have the boggart living in it.

"Er- Tonks, dear?" Molly caught Tonks's attention.

"Hm? Oh, yes…" Tonks said reluctantly. She wasn't sure if she wanted to tell anyone just yet.

She sighed, and then tried again. "Molly, it-it's Lupin," Tonks sank to her knees and began to cry in her hands, but before she could speak, Molly cut in front of her.

"You love him, don't you, Tonks?"

Tonks raised her head from her hands, "Ho-How did y-you know?" she was completely shocked that someone already knew.

"It is how you act in his presence, when you're around him, when he's mentioned in a conversation, you just….Change, Tonks. I always knew something changed when you recovered after the issue at the Department of Mysteries, but I thought you were just devastated about Sirius's death; you couldn't change your appearance at will, and your patronus had changed. It was only when I saw your patronus myself, and noticed that it was a were-wolf that it dawned on me, that you must've loved him." she gave Tonks a small smile.

Tonks managed to stand up, but was still crying. "What do I do, Molly? Remus is bound to find out eventually, and my parents will _never_ approve…" she sobbed.

Mrs Weasly pulled Tonks into a hug. "I know its hard dear, but I think the best thing you could do is tell him," Molly saw Tonks's shocked face, and decided to continue talking, "Tonks, why don't you come over to The Burrow tonight, and we can talk a little more."

Tonks nodded. She didn't know why she found it so hard to secretly love someone; maybe it was because she feared that he wouldn't love him back, or the fact that Remus was a were-wolf, and nobody-especially her parents- would approve.


	2. Chapter 2: Lupin

CHAPTER 2

LUPIN

Remus was just as confused as Tonks; why did she act so strangely around him? And, why, was she _always_ so miserable; Tonks didn't seem to be able to cope with much, she always kept the same, dull, mouse brown hair, she lied to him, saying she was fine, when _everybody_ could see that she wasn't and, on top of everything, why did her patronus look like a were-wolf?

Lupin was too busy pondering in his own thoughts that he didn't realise he and Tonks were the only ones left in the dank kitchen; the meeting had finished and all the members of the Order had disapparated to other places that they had to be that night.

"Didn't you realise that everybody else had left, Lupin?" Tonks asked shyly from her perch on the bench.

"What? Oh, it's just you Tonks," he gave her a small smile, "I was thinking, a lot, obviously," he gave a small chuckle, "Tonks?" she didn't look up.

"Hm, yes, Lupin?"

"I'm really worried about you, Tonks – everyone is. So, I – I just hope that you are yourself soon, because I'm missing the cheerful, bubbly you, I think everyone is," he looked up at the clock "Goodness me! Is it that time already?" I'm sorry Tonks, but I have to go now, er- things for Dumbledore." He added hastily.

"Oh, er- goodbye, Remus." Lupin had a brief look at Tonks, whose eyes were red and puffy; she had been crying, he didn't know for how long, but he felt extremely guilty. Tonks jumped down from the bench hastily and made her way to the front door, knocking down the troll foot umbrella stand on the way.

"_What did I say- or do- to make her so miserable? Tonks was hiding her face, so I couldn't see her crying, but why was she weeping?"_

Lupin pondered on his thoughts for a little longer, and then he walked to the front door, pulled the troll's foot upright and exited number 12 Grimmaud Place.

He trudged along the dark, lamp lit street, his hands stuffed into his shabby coat pockets. Still thinking about the Orders meeting, and the strange events that followed that evening with Tonks, Lupin accidentally walked into Arthur Weasley.

"Oh! Er- sorry Arthur, I didn't notice you; it certainly has been a strange day…" he forced a smile.

"Ah, hello, Remus! Please, do not apologise, for it is probably me who wasn't paying attention. I have seen how strange today _has_ been for you, with Tonks and whatnot, but we are all worried about Nymphadora, so, just try not to get yourself too worked up about things, OK, Lupin?"

"What? Oh, er- OK, Arthur…. Well, goodnight, then." Lupin walked into the darkness, not knowing what to do, or how he could help mend Tonks's broken heart. He didn't actually have to do anything for Dumbledore, and now he thoroughly regretted lying to Tonks.

Lupin reached the end of the street and apparated to The Burrow. Once he reached the Weasley's front door, he knocked. He heard Molly's voice, and then, she was there.

"Oh, it's only you, Remus. I am so, so sorry, but, well, right now isn't the right time to see us," she looked at Tonks, who, once again, looked like she'd been crying.

"Oh! Er- I'm very sorry to have intruded… Well, I guess I'll be going then."

"Firstly can I have a word with you outside, Lupin?" Molly asked.

"What? Oh, yeah, that's fine," he followed Mrs Weasley outside.

"Remus, its Tonks," she said wit a sad smile.

"What's wrong with her? Did you find out?" Lupin had wanted to know what was wrong with his fellow colleague since she recovered from the fight at the ministry.

"Lupin, she's in love," Molly began

"What! But with who?" he exclaimed

"…With you." Molly finished.

"What! With-with me? _How_ could she love _me?_ I mean to say, I'm much too old for her, and too poor, far too dangerous and, there is of course, the fact that I'm a, a were-wolf."

"I know it's a lot to take in, Remus, but you cannot fight love," she said with a small smile. "Just talk to her, because she's feeling, as you know, quite upset.

Lupin made a movement to go inside

"Oh, er- just not tonight, dear. I don't think Tonks isn't in a fit state to talk with anyone tonight," Molly stole another quick glance through the open door at Tonks, whose face was covered with her hands.

Lupin looked too, and didn't know what to feel. He felt it was his fault for making Tonks so miserable, but then he also felt shocked that she loved _him_. "Well, I best be off Molly…. I will see you tomorrow, I presume?"

"Yes, probably," she looked at Tonks once more, "I don't think we will be Nymphadora, though," she said sadly

Lupin agreed. "Well, goodbye then, Mrs Weasley."

"Yes, well, take care of yourself dear." Mrs Weasley went back inside, and looked like she was trying to comfort Tonks.

Remus took one last look at The Burrow, then disapparated, to a quiet place, where he could think alone.


	3. Chapter 3: Tonks

CHAPTER 3

TONKS

Tonks lifted her head from the large table; Mrs Weasley had placed a comforting hand on her shoulder.

"What did he say, Molly?" Tonks asked, for Mrs Weasley had just told-or rather confessed- to Lupin that Tonks had fallen in love with him. She felt ashamed for getting someone else to confess to him, but she couldn't face him, not just then, anyway.

"Well, he was completely shocked, as you may've guessed, and he also said 'I'm much too old for her, and too poor, too dangerous and there's the problem that he's a werewolf.' I think he wanted to talk to you tonight, but I told him it wouldn't be the greatest idea," she gave Tonks a small smile.

"Thank you Molly, for everything. It feels like a great weight has been lifted off my shoulders, but I just don't know if I'll ever be able to face him again!" Tonks sighed.

Molly didn't know what to say. "You're very welcome, Nymph- oh, I mean, Tonks. Just remember, whenever you need someone to talk to, just come over, all right dear?"

"Thanks, Molly. I'm sorry, but I need to go now, my parents are expecting me for dinner at their place." Tonks stood up and wiped tears from her eyes.

"OK, well, goodbye, Tonks," Molly gave her another reassuring smile.

Tonks groaned. "My parents! They will _never_ approve. And I don't know _how_ or _when_ I'm going to tell them. Ah, well. I guess I'm going to have to see what they say, but they are going to be really pissed off," she gave Mrs Weasley a small smile; she hadn't smiled in what seemed like ages. "Well, see-you, Molly," Tonks had reached the door by now, and opened it, then she was swallowed by the dark night. Tonks then disapparated to her parents' house.

Tonks reached the front door of her parents' house, and knocked. Her father, Ted Tonks, who had a large stomach and fair hair, answered the door.

"Dora! It really is lovely to see you again." he smiled, and Tonks tried her best to smile back.

"It's really nice to see you too, dad," she replied, hugging him. "Where's mum?" she asked.

"Oh, your mother's just getting some dinner sorted!" he said nicely. "Now, come on in, Dora," he said with another smile.

Tonks obliged, and stepped inside.

"Dromeda, Dora's here!" Ted said, with an air if excitement in his voice.

A woman emerged from the brightly lit kitchen. At first glance, she looked a lot like her sister Bellatrix Black, but she had a light, soft brown hair colour and wider, kinder eyes.

"Oh, Nymphadora!" she squealed, sounding absolutely delighted. Tonks scowled; she absolutely hated it when her mother called her Nymphadora. "How are you honey? You don't look well, to be perfectly honest and you're much too thin, but that's nothing that a little food can't fix." Dromeda hugged her daughter; her only child.

Tonks hugged her back. If there was one other thing she didn't like about her mother, it was the fact she worried about things far too much. "Mum, honestly, I'm fine. I just haven't been sleeping well, and haven't had much of an appetite lately." the truth was, of course, Lupin, but Tonks didn't want to bring that subject up just yet.

"But, dear, you haven't been changing your hair-or any of your appearance- for ages!" her mother insisted, "And your patronus has-."

"I know! I know!" said Tonks, now getting thoroughly annoyed. "I know my patronus has changed! I'm sorry, mum, but I've heard this from just about _everyone_!"

Ted, who had been sitting on the couch, finally spoke "That's because _everyone_ is worried about you, Dora!" he exclaimed. "Especially your mother and I." he added.

Meanwhile, Tonks's mother had disappeared into the kitchen again. "Dinner is ready, you two!" her voice came from the kitchen, then she came into view, with a large tray laden with a variety of food and drink; pumpkin juice (Tonks's favourite!), steak and kidney pie, onion soup, fresh bread… far too much food for just three people.

"Wow. Don't you think that's a little too much food, mum?" Tonks was amazed by the immense amount of food that her mother had put before them, and was also curious.

"Oh! Didn't either of us tell you?" asked Dromeda, but made it subtlety obvious that they 'forgot' to tell her on purpose. "We're having a guest over tonight."

"Who?" asked Tonks curiously.

"Remus." she replied.

Tonks's heart sank; Remus was coming, just mere hours since he'd found out she loved him. "Oh, er- that's nice," she said, managing a small smile. "Why are they coming over, though?" she asked. "I'm not trying to be nosy or anything!" Tonks added hastily.

This time, it was Ted's turn to talk. "Well, we thought it would be nice if we had a few other people over too," he said with a smile.

"_But why Lupin!"_ thought Tonks hopelessly _"Of all people, my parents invite Lupin! Of course, my parents don't know, but I'm bound to screw up somehow…I could make an excuse, but that's just completely heartless! Well… I guess I'll just have to see what happens, and try to avoid Lupin as much as possible."_

A few minutes later there was a knock at the door. Tonks feelings went berserk; she felt her spirits rise at the sight of the figure at the door, but then she also felt them drop, for the shabby person with greying her at the door was none other than Remus Lupin.

Tonks looked at the floor; she couldn't bear to look at him, not just after the conversation he'd had with Mrs Weasley. Tonks's mother let Lupin in.

"Urgh. The weather is absolutely _horrible_ outside! Thank you very much for inviting me, Ted and Dromeda by the way," Lupin pulled off his shabby coat and noticed Tonks, who was staring determinedly at the floor, for the first time. "Ah, hello Tonks!" he said warmly, giving her a big smile.

Tonks couldn't help herself she smiled widely back at him, but it was still terribly awkward. "Hi, Lupin." she said quietly, almost shyly.

Remus crossed the living room floor and sat on the chair opposite Tonks. He tried to catch Tonks's eye, but she was deliberately trying to avoid it.

"Come get something to eat you two," called Tonks's mother.

"I'm alright thank you, Dromeda, I had something a little earlier," said Lupin

"Thanks mum, but er- I'm not hungry either." Tonks always seemed to lose her appetite when something to do with Lupin came up.

"Now, young lady!" exclaimed Tonks's mother, "You are becoming very thin, and you _are_ going to eat something!"

"But, mum!"

"No buts Nymphadora," Dromeda came into the living room once more, carrying a plate full of food and a goblet of pumpkin juice.

Tonks finished the food quickly then sat in silence.

Finally, when Tonks decided that she couldn't stand the awkward silence between her and Lupin (her mother and father were talking), she decided to talk.

"So, er- Lupin?" she asked

"Hm? Yes, Tonks?" he replied.

"Why did my parents invite _you_ tonight?" Tonks asked.

Remus chuckled before he answered. "To be honest, I don't really know!" he said. "I don't even think your parents like me very much," he added quietly. "But I approached them yesterday, and expressed my concerns for you, then, out of the blue, they just asked; 'do you want to come over for dinner tomorrow?' And I knew it would've been rude to refuse, so I obliged," he said, "And here I am!" he finished with another small laugh.

Tonks laughed too. She always changed when _he_ was with her. She'd have to tell him one day….

"Tonks?" asked Lupin, almost reluctantly. "Er- may-may I talk to you?" he sounded nervous.

Tonks nodded. "Do you want to talk to me alone?"

"Yes," he nodded "Do you know where we can go?"

Tonks beckoned for Lupin to follow her. "Follow me," she said.

Tonks led him down the wooden floored hallway into the guest bedroom; the room she slept in when she stayed with her parents.

"In here." she said quietly.

Lupin entered the room, followed by Nymphadora, who closed the door behind her. She knew what was coming, so she braced herself for a huge emotional blow.

"Tonks, I'm just going to get this over and done with. Molly told me tonight about…. Well, you know. But I just want to say, it's a really bad idea," he took Tonks's hands with his own. "Tonks, I'm much too old for you. I'm extremely poor, and dangerous. And, of course, I'm a werewolf." he sighed, and looked at their hands.

"I know, I know!" replied Tonks, starting to sound furious. "But do you think I _really_ care if you're too old, poor and dangerous. I _don't care_ if you're a werewolf. I'm in love with you, Remus, and now, I'm not ashamed to admit it now." she looked into his eyes for the first time in months; he had tears in his eyes, and Tonks was now crying. Remus broke their gaze, and let go of Tonks's hands. He looked away.

"Tonks, I- I'm so sorry…" his voice trailed off. He walked out of the guest bedroom.

Tonks fell onto the bed in the room and cried, face down. What was she supposed to do? She had upset Lupin; that was obvious. But _why_ was he so close to tears after she'd said those things about her being proud to be in love with him; a werewolf?

Tonks jumped up from the bed and ran down the hall. Was Lupin still here? Or did he leave? Tonks didn't know what to expect; part of her wanted Lupin to still be there, but another part of her hoped that he'd gone. She burst through the Living Room door. Lupin wasn't there.

"Where's Remus?" Tonks asked.

"Darling, he just left a couple of minutes ago." Dromeda answered.

"But, why?" Tonks asked.

"I don't actually know!" replied her mother. "He just said he needed to go, but thank you for your hospitality. To be honest, he didn't look very happy…. What _were_ you two talking about in the guest bedroom anyway?" her mother asked curiously.

Tonks's hear sank. She thought this was coming. What was she going to say? Tonks knew one thing; she was going to have to make something up. "Oh, er- he just wanted to talk to me about the er- the order meeting we just had today," she stifled a fake yawn. "Well, I'm exhausted! I guess I'd better be going now."

"No, Dora, why don't you stay the night? You can stay in the guest room." Ted asked

Tonks knew it would be rude to refuse. "Well, OK then, dad," she smiled. "Well, I'll be going to bed now, I think," she nodded. "Goodnight, mum, dad." she hugged each of them in turn, then made her way back to the guest bedroom, where she only just had the conversation with Lupin, and she had the freedom to think over what had just happened that last day.

A few hours later, Tonks's mother came in. Tonks, who had almost fallen asleep on the bed, sat up.

Her mother sat next to her. "Honey, Remus just came in before," she said. "Do you want to tell me what's going on?" she looked concerned.

Tonks didn't know what to say. "Mum, wha-what are you talking about?" she asked, even though she had a pretty good idea of what her mother meant.

Dromeda frowned. "Tonks, please explain why Lupin just came in, looking absolutely bewildered, telling us that you'd fallen in love with him?" she asked.

"Maybe he was drunk?" suggested Tonks, most unhelpfully.

Her mother looked angrier. "I don't think Remus was drunk Nymphadora, so I want some answers _pronto._"

"Well, there's nothing else to explain," replied Tonks. She felt scared; why the hell had Remus told her parents? _"I guess I would've too, if I found out something like that." _she thought.

"I won't deny it; I've fallen in love with a werewolf, and I'm not ashamed to admit it now," she said it confidently, even though she was still feeling terrified."Is he still here?" she asked her mother, but knew it was a bad idea.

Her mother sighed. "He is still here, Tonks," she replied. "But you aren't seeing him."

Tonks groaned. "But I want to sort this out, so I'm seeing him, and I don't care what you say!" she got up from the bed, and, guessing he was in the living room, went down the hall.

She was right; Lupin was there, his hair striped with grey, his young face lined with a few wrinkles. He stood up.

"Tonks, I'm sorry," he began.

She slapped him. "How could you? You- you _BASTARD_!" she screamed furiously. "I was reluctant when Molly offered to tell you, then you go and tell my friggin' parents!" she began to cry.

"Tonks!" he yelled, trying to get her attention. "How do you think I feel? I feel so guilty for telling your parents, but I don't know what came over me! I had a pretty good life, Nymphadora-,"

"DON'T CALL ME THAT!" she screamed.

"As I was saying, I had a pretty good life, until, you told me you weren't ashamed for falling in love with me, and you stuff it up!" he yelled.

"Oh, so this is my fault is it?" she said furiously, still crying. She collapsed into Lupin's arms, and cried, and cried. Then, Lupin did something neither he nor Tonks was expecting….he kissed her. It was a romantic kiss; it felt like she and Remus were _meant_ to be sharing it, and Tonks felt embarrassed for her parents were looking through the doorway, but it was absolute bliss. Amazingly, Tonks's hair changed to a bright shade of pink. But, as soon as it started, it seemed to finish. Once they had finished kissing, Tonks's hair turned back to its now usual mousey brown. Lupin put a finger under her chin, and lifted it up, so she looked him right in the eyes. He gave her a small, sad smile.

"I'm sorry, Tonks, but this just won't work." he gave her another sad smile, and this time Tonks saw tears in his eyes. He dropped her chin, and turned to leave.

Tonks wanted to stop him, but she couldn't find the words; she was glued to the spot. "Lupin," she said quietly. "Lupin, don't go." Tonks managed to find the use of her legs again and followed Lupin outside. She stumbled on, blinded by confusion.

"Lupin!" she called, a little louder, but it was too late. Remus had just disapparated. Tonks knelt down in the long, green grass. She felt lonely, and confused; she had no-one to confide to about what had just happened that night; it was far too late to see Molly, and _her parents_ had seen them. She didn't _want_ to go back up to the large wooden house, but she did anyway.

Before her parents could question her, Tonks cut in. "I DO NOT want to talk right now," she said. "I'm going to bed." Tonks felt guilty for speaking to her parents like this, especially after seeing their bewildered faces, but it was true; she wasn't in the mood to talk to _anyone_, especially her parents.

She felt ashamed, more than anything; she had gotten carried away! _"I wouldn't feel as guilty if my parents weren't watching," _she thought haughtily. _"But what am I going to do now! Lupin must feel just as ashamed as I do, but will we ever be able to face each other ever again?"_ she quickly got this thought out of her head. _"Yes. It may take a while, but I will see Remus Lupin again. I don't know when, and I don't know how, but we will see each other again"_ she thought determinedly. Then, after much tossing and turning, and thinking about those days peculiar events, Tonks finally went into a restless sleep, with dreams of werewolves, and shabby, poor, dangerous men


	4. Chapter 4: Lupin

CHAPTER 4

LUPIN

Remus couldn't believe what he'd just done. He wouldn't believe it. _Why _had he just kissed Nymphadora Tonks? He felt absolutely horrible! _"I should've never gone to her parents' house tonight,"_ he thought furiously. _"This is my entire fault! Why the hell did I have to go and tell her parents? She will never forgive me… and then, I have to screw things up even more by kissing her!" _ Lupin felt so confused. What was the mad urge to kiss her he felt when she had collapsed, crying on him? He had a sinking feeling. What if… _what if?_ What if _he _was in love with_ her_?

"_That cannot be right."_ He thought. _"It's absolutely impossible!"_ Lupin laughed to himself, trying to convince himself that he wasn't in love with Tonks.

Remus didn't realise how much time he had spent pondering on the past nights events. Before he knew it, the sun was dawning on a new day, and it was then when he decided to leave his temporary home in the Leaky Cauldron, and seek someone he could talk to about the night's misdemeanours.

"_The person I really should talk to right now is Tonks," _he thought. _"But, I don't think she wants to see me…probably as much as I don't want to see her."_

The first person he saw was Alastor Moody.

"Ar, hello Remus!" Alastor said. "You don't look well," he added. "Are you OK?"

"Hi, Alastor," replied Lupin. He sighed. "I'll be honest with you; I'm not OK, you see, I- I did something that I'm never going to be able to forgive myself for doing.

"And what's that?" asked Moody.

"Er- well, you see, Alastor-,"

"Come on, spit it out, lad!" said Alastor encouragingly.

"I kissed Tonks last night." Lupin's reply was merely a mumble.

"Well, what's wrong with that?" asked Alastor.

Lupin knew he shouldn't tell Alastor what the real reason was, so he didn't. "Oh, er- nothing, Moody, nothing," he replied. "It's just going to be really awkward to talk to her…. _And_ I kissed her in front of her _parents!_" he sighed.

"Well, why did you kiss her in front of her parents?" asked Moody. "Even I have the brains to kiss someone when their parents aren't looking!" he laughed.

"That's the thing, Alastor; I don't know _what_ came over me when I did kiss her. I just felt this _urge_ to do it, and it overcame me….." he sunk his head in shame. "I thoroughly regret it now." Lupin said.

"Well, I'm no guru with relationships," began Alastor. "But I still don't see why you're beating yourself up about this!" he said.

Remus sighed. Wasn't _anyone_ going to understand? "You wouldn't understand, Alastor. I've already hurt Tonks enough, so I'm not going to spread anything else around," he said with a small nod. "Well, I best be off, Alastor. It was nice talking to you." Lupin started walking; he didn't really need to go, but if there was _one _thing he knew; it was that Alastor _wouldn't _be able to help him with his problems.

"Ah, well, goodbye, lad," said Alastor. "I will be seeing you soon, I presume?" he asked.

"Yes, probably." Lupin replied from over his shoulder.

Who could he talk to? Nymphadora was probably talking to Molly again, so there was no point going to the Burrow, but it seemed that Mrs Weasley was the only one who knew and understood the dilemma they were both in.

"_Maybe,"_ thought Lupin. _"Maybe it would be a good thing if I bumped into Tonks; then I could talk to her, and give her a real apology," _he decided to go to Fred and George Weasley's shop; Weasleys' Wizard Wheezes, in Diagon Alley, as he knew something they had that might cheer her up; "Patented Daydream charms"… _'One simple incantation and you will enter a top quality, highly realistic 30-minute daydream…' "This is exactly what Tonks needs,"_ thought Lupin. _"I think. Getting away from real life could help her."_

He bought it from Fred Weasley, for 2 galleons and 3 knuts.

"Thanks, Fred," Lupin said gratefully. "You, know, _all_ the things you've created with your brother, are absolutely amazing!" he exclaimed.

"It's no problem, really Remus," replied Fred modestly. "Thank you; we do work very hard to make our products perfect." he puffed out his chest.

Lupin smiled. "Well, goodbye, Fred."

"See ya, Remus."

Remus walked out of the shop after briefly saying 'hello' to George.

Lupin walked along Diagon Alley, which was usually crowded with witches and wizards of all ages, and was surprised to see it almost deserted. He reached the brick wall that went back into The Leaky Cauldron, and tapped the particular brick with his wand that made the archway appear. He walked through, and the archway disappeared; replacing it was, once again, the brick wall.

He had made up his mind; he _was_ going to go to The Burrow, to talk to Molly, and, maybe, Tonks. Knowing he couldn't disapparate in front of muggles, he decided to do it from The Leaky Cauldron.

Lupin had landed in the Weasleys' front yard. He went around to the back door, which was littered with many pairs of Wellington Boots, and knocked. To his relief, it was Molly who answered.

"Oh, hello, Remus, are you Ok?" she asked. Lupin wasn't sure if she'd heard about him kissing Tonks yet.

"Well, not _really_, Molly," he confessed. "Has Tonks already told you what happened, or-," Molly looked concerned.

"What's happened, Remus?" she asked. "Come in and sit down." she added.

So Remus told her all the events -in order- of that past night; getting slapped by Tonks, telling her parents that their daughter had fallen in love with a werewolf, their conversation in the guest bedroom - and, the main reason why Lupin had gone to see Molly- their kiss.

Molly listened thoughtfully; she didn't interrupt or talk while Lupin was speaking. Remus was surprised that Tonks had not yet told Molly of their problems. _"Maybe, her parents wouldn't let her leave the house because they thought she would see Me." _he thought. _"Why would Tonks even want to see me?"_ He also found it great to tell someone the _whole_ story of what had happened that last night.

Molly pursed her lips, looking concerned.

"So- so this happened all last night?" she asked. "Wow. That's a lot for two people to go through," she said, giving Remus a small smile.

Lupin nodded in agreement. "But I just feel so guilty now!" he exclaimed. "I thoroughly deserved that slap…." his voice trailed off. As he had said this many time before, he said it to Molly also. "I don't know what came over me when I kissed her though," he gave a little shudder. Before he continued, Molly spoke.

"What? Was it really that bad kissing Tonks?" she asked.

"Whoa, of course, it wasn't Molly; I just fear that she will get the wrong idea… something like I have feelings for her…." Lupin stopped talking, for Mrs Weasley was smiling broadly, but still looking sympathetic. "Wha –What did I say?" he asked her.

"Oh, nothing," she said happily. "May I ask though, _did_ you enjoy snogging Tonks last night?"

"Well, er- it was…. Nice, yes," he said with a small nod. "But what do I do Molly? I doubt she'll ever want to see me again because of all the humility I put her through last night," he hung his head in shame. "I cannot imagine a life without Tonks, Molly. I mean to say; we've known each other for _years_," he said. "She's always known what to say or do to cheer me up, and now, now I just feel like I've turned my back on her when she needs someone most. Shouldn't I be the one she needs?" he asked Molly.

"Well, you are most likely the person she needs most. Maybe she doesn't know that just yet, but maybe she does. Remus, you and I have always been her shoulder to cry on, and I think we should continue doing so," Lupin nodded in agreement. He didn't know how he was one of Tonks's 'shoulders to cry on', but he knew he was going to live up to that name from then on.

"But, what I don't understand," Lupin said. "How have _I _always been someone that comforts Tonks when she cries?" he asked.

"Well, what I mean, Remus; is that she usually goes to you or me when she is upset; she confides in us her secrets…. She tells us almost everything," she replied. "As I was saying before, we should continue to comfort Tonks, especially now," she saw Lupin's face, which looked shocked. "I know you don't think you can comfort her," she gave a small laugh. "You think what you did last night was foolish; I do admit telling her parents was, but you kissing her; you were just trying to comfort her." Molly said.

Lupin felt better once Molly had said that; he kissed Tonks to comfort her! It made sense. "Thank you, Molly; what you say really does make sense! It makes me feel so much better to have someone interpret my problems. And, the fact that _you_ know why I kissed Tonks, must make you some sort of relationship expert!" Molly smiled happily at Lupin.

"Well, I'm glad I could help, dear. These times we are going through right now, are hard. Especially for Nymphadora-,"

"DO NOT call me that," a voice came from the doorway. "Please, Molly, you know how much I hate that name."

"Oh, hello, Tonks, dear," said Molly sheepishly. "Please, do come in," Tonks entered the kitchen with a sour look on her face. She sat opposite Lupin with her arms crossed tightly. She acted as though he wasn't there. "So, how are you anyway, Tonks?" asked Molly.

"Firstly," replied Tonks. "I only just got here, and, secondly, I feel absolutely terrible." she scowled at Lupin.

"Hi, Tonks," he said quietly, not meeting her eyes.

"Wotcher, Lupin." Tonks replied.

Then he remembered the gift he got her; the daydream charm.

"Er- Tonks? I just wanted to say; I am so, so sorry for the pain and humiliation I put you through last night. So er- well, I decided to get you something, to show how sorry I really am." Tonks looked at him, so he decided to get the charm from his pocket. He gave it to her. Lupin gave her a small smile. She returned it.

"Thanks, Lupin," she said quietly. "It may take some time for me to forgive you completely, but, apology accepted. By the way, how did you know I wanted one of these?" she asked, holding up the charm she had just received.

He shrugged. "Lucky guess?" he said with a smile.

Remus felt so relieved that Tonks had forgiven him even partially. Even though she said t would probably take some time to forgive him completely. He didn't mind at all; he found it nice to be on speaking terms with her again. True; it _was_ awkward talking to the girl he'd kissed the night before but, it felt like Remus was talking to a long lost friend; he felt like he'd lost Tonks the night before, and then, she was there; not completely healed, but with him in one form or another.

A few hours had passed while Lupin was talking to Tonks and Molly; he didn't realise it though; he'd been enjoying the company immensely.

"Wow!" exclaimed Tonks. "Would you look at the time? We've been talking for _hours_!" she gave both Molly and Lupin a small smile. "I'm sorry, but I really need to get going," she winked at Lupin, although he didn't know why. "I've got to get some supplies from Diagon Alley," she added. She stood up and headed toward the door.

"Well, why don't you come back for dinner?" asked Molly. "Remus, you can come too if you like." she added.

"I'd love to," said Lupin. "But I'll need to come back later, if that's alright with you, I've still got things I need to do." he added.

"I'm really sorry, Molly, but my parents are wanting me to go back to their place for dinner." replied Tonks.

"That's quite alright, dear." Molly said with a small smile.

Tonks turned around and went outside.

"May I ask Molly, but _why_ do you keep on inviting Tonks over for meals?" he asked. "I'm not trying to be rude or anything. Just curious." he added.

Molly smiled. "Well, you know my son Bill?" she laughed. "Well, of course you do. As you know he's getting married to Fleur Delacour, and well…. I was hoping that, if I started inviting Tonks over more often, he would start to like her rather than Fleur," she smiled sheepishly. "I don't really like Fleur," she added quietly. "And it's obvious that my plan isn't going to work." Molly smiled at Lupin, and he smiled back.

"Well, I'd better be going now," he said. "What time can I come back?" he asked.

"Oh, whenever, dear." she replied.

Lupin walked out the door, only to find Tonks still standing in the yard.

"Hello, Tonks." Lupin said. "What _are_ you doing out here?" he asked.

"Well, I really wanted to talk to you, but now I don't know what to say!" she laughed nervously.

"Well, then, let me talk," said Lupin with a small smile. "I still cannot express how sincerely sorry I am about all those horrible things I said about you last night. I will never be able to forgive myself for telling your parents, and I can't believe I humiliated you by kissing you in front of your parents." he finished with a sigh, and was surprised to see Tonks smiling, but with tears in her eyes.

"Please, don't worry about all the wrong things we did last night, because I was just as bad as you and it was in the past; we can't change it. So, I'm also sorry," she said. "And, I have to admit, you are a _really_ good kisser!" she exclaimed. "And, I really enjoyed kissing you last night," Tonks kissed him on the cheek. "Well, goodbye, Lupin." she said, disapparating to where Lupin was guessing, Diagon Alley.

He shook his head, _"Why doesn't she get it?"_ he thought bitterly. _"I've already told her that a serious relationship between us. I've already told her that I'm too old, dangerous and poor. I have told her I'm a were wolf. But still, she doesn't want to give up. She wants me, but I guess I will just have to remind her again that I'm not good enough for her. She needs a young, full man, not just some riffraff like me."_ He had made up his mind. Lupin was going to go to Diagon Alley once more, in hopes to intercept Tonks and remind her of what he'd said the previous night. He nodded at his idea, then he disapparated to Diagon Alley.

Although Lupin guessed that Tonks would arrive in Diagon Alley a few minutes before him, he was finding it extremely difficult to find her. He was now losing hope that Tonks was even _in_ Diagon Alley.

"_She could be anywhere."_ He thought, frustrated. _"For all I know, she could've been lying, but I doubt she was. Maybe she's doing other things before she comes? Maybe she only stopped for a few seconds?" _Remus was at a complete loss, and was thoroughly tempted to give up for the day and send her a letter via owl.

"_But I would much rather talk to her face to face." _he thought.

Remus was beginning to find Diagon Alley not entertaining in the slightest. Most of the shops were closed, and in his quest to find Tonks, he'd visited almost all of them, except….. _"Except Flourish and Blots," _thought Lupin. "And the shops down Knockturn Alley." he said out loud.

Lupin decided to visit Flourish and Blots, the book store, first.

After a few minutes, Lupin reached the large book store, which had large shelves from the ceiling to the floor covered in, well, books. He scanned the whole shop from top to bottom, corner to corner, and was surprised to see Tonks sitting cross legged at the foot of one of the shelves with large piles of books around her. Lupin tried to stay quiet, but too late; Tonks had already lifted her head from the book she was reading upon Remus's arrival.

"Wotcher, Lupin," she said quietly, her face back in a book.

Lupin had never seen her so calm and quiet ever before; he found it quite shocking. "Hello, Tonks," he said, sitting down with her. Before he could continue speaking, Tonks spoke.

"So, er- why did you come to Diagon Alley?" she asked.

He knew he couldn't lie to her again. "I needed to talk to you," he replied. "So _please_ listen," Tonks looked up from her book, with an intense look of concentration in her eyes. "Well, Tonks, I know you've already heard this about three times in the last couple of days already, but I don't really think you understand what I am saying. So, here goes; Tonks; I'm too old for you. I'm too poor, I'm a were wolf and I'm dangerous. I think going into a serious relationship with you would be a bad mistake, not because I don't like you; I like you, quite a lot too, but just as a friend. It is because I would make you an outcast, because of what I am." Lupin looked at Tonks, and she didn't look very happy.

"Well, Lupin, I'm going to tell you again," she replied calmly. "Do you _really_ think I _care_ if you're," she started to count the factors off her fingers. "Too old, poor or dangerous? Do you think I care if you're a were wolf, and if we went into a serious relationship I would become an outcast like you?" she was looking furious now. "I _do not_ care about any of those things, Remus," she said quietly, meeting his gaze. "I'm in love with you; a were wolf and I am not ashamed to admit that now." she gave a small, determined nod.

Lupin shook his head. "I'm sorry, Tonks, but this will not work!" he exclaimed. "I- I've got to go," he said quietly. "Tonks," he said talking her hands in his, "Please, I'm doing this for your own good. So please, please, listen to me," they met each others gaze. "I don't want to hurt you, Tonks," Lupin said quietly. He stood up and left the shop, leaving Tonks looking sad, angry, and as bewildered and confused as he was yesterday. He shook his head, convincing himself he'd done the right thing, and exited Flourish and Blots.


	5. Chapter 5: Tonks

CHAPTER 5

TONKS

Tonks was pissed off. There was no denying it. There was no other feeling that she could make room for, but, for some reason, she didn't know why she was feeling so annoyed and frustrated. Sure, part of this negative feeling was toward Lupin, but that was easily explained. But why else was she feeling so down?

It was after a few minutes that she realised she was feeling disappointed also. So, she soon realised grudgingly that all her negative feelings were toward Remus.

"_Why won't he understand that he's the one for me? Why can he not see that I do not care about any of the things he says are wrong with him?" _she thought. She felt confused; like there was nobody she could talk to. Molly understood her, but not completely, so Tonks felt like she had to keep her feelings locked up from everybody - but maybe just not Molly, for she was very sympathetic and usually very understanding; even if she didn't know _exactly_ how Tonks felt.

Tonks groaned. It was nearly six o'clock; she was supposed to be at her parents soon. She got to her feet and placed the large pile of books beside her on their shelves. She didn't know why she was reading; she read for no reason quite a lot.

"_Probably because reading takes my mind off things I don't want to think about and it soothes me."_ she thought.

Tonks exited Flourish and Blots onto the darkened lane of Diagon Alley. From there, she walked down toward the brick wall in front of the Leaky Cauldron. Then, she tapped her wand on one particular brick, and an archway appeared, leading into the Leaky Cauldron. She sighed. Tonks knew why her parents wanted her to go to their place for dinner again; they wanted to persuade her that what she was doing was a bad idea.

"_But I'm grown up,"_ she thought bitterly. _"I am perfectly capable of making my own decisions."_ Then, she disapparated to her parents' house just like the night before, except, this night, _"Lupin won't be there."_ Tonks thought, both happy and disappointed.

Tonks arrived at her parents' place just in time. That night though, her mother answered the door.

"Ah, hello Nymphadora!" her mother cried happily, hugging her only child. Tonks scowled, but still hugged her mother back.

"Hi, mum." was all she could manage to say.

"Please, do come in." said her mother, beckoning for Tonks to come inside.

Tonks obliged. She stepped into the large living room, to see her father lounging on the couch.

"Dad!" she said happily. If there was one thing she really liked about her father, it was that he respected her not liking being called Nymphadora.

"Hello, Dora, dear," Ted said with a smile, getting to his feet and walking over to hug her. "Come on; sit down, while your mother fixes us up something to eat," he said with a smile, sitting down and patting the seat next to him, wanting Tonks to sit there. "So, we have exploding snap, gobstones, chocolate frogs… any game that interests you?" he asked curiously?

Tonks shook her head. "No thanks, dad," she said. "I'm happy just to talk to you." she said with a small smile.

"Well, OK, then, Dora," Ted said, rubbing his hands together. "What do you want to talk about?" he asked.

Tonks shrugged. "I don't actually know!" she said with a smile. "But it's just nice to talk to my dad. I like it." Tonks looked at her father and smiled.

He smiled back. "Come on, then, Tonks!" he said eagerly. "Just _one_ game of exploding snap?" he asked pleadingly.

"Well…." began Tonks, taunting her father by taking her time. "Oh, all right then!" she finished with a smile.

Ted smiled back and then he grabbed the cards from the small glass coffee table.

Both Tonks and Ted managed to become very competitive through their few games of exploding snap, but had to hold off the "Tournament" as they called it, for Dromeda had just finished making dinner.

"Come on, you two," Dromeda said. "You will have time to finish your 'Tournament', later." she said.

Tonks and Ted groaned. "But mum!" exclaimed Tonks.

Ted finished off her sentence. "Come on, Dromeda, it's not every day I get to spend time with my daughter playing cards!" he said with a small smile.

His wife smiled back. "I promise you can finish playing Exploding Snap later," she said. "But right now, we need to have dinner before it gets cold." Dromeda beckoned for Tonks and Ted to follow her to the Dining Room. They both groaned, then reluctantly followed Tonks's mother.

Once they'd started eating, and everyone had been talking for a while Dromeda talked. "Now, Tonks, what did _you_ do today?" she asked.

Tonks finished her mouthful of food then spoke. "Well, I went to The Burrow to er- to say hello to Molly," she said with a small nod. "And," Tonks knew this was going to be hard; her parents wouldn't be happy with her seeing Lupin. "And, well, Lupin was there." she said quietly. As she expected, her parents –especially her mother- didn't look happy at all.

"Go on." her mother said quietly.

"And, well, I ended up spending quite a few hours at The Burrow talking to Molly and Remus. Oh, and I almost forgot, Lupin got me this," she pulled out the daydream charm from her pocket. 'It's a patented dream charm-from Fred and George's shop." Tonks tried to smile at her parents. Her father smiled back, but stopped almost instantly. Tonks guessed that her mother had kicked him from under the table. Obviously, her mother was frowning.

"Tonks," she said quietly. "Nymphadora, I – well, we're all worried about you. I personally believe that what you are doing – with Lupin and everything- is a very bad idea."

This time it was Tonks's turn scowl. Not just because her mother had called her Nymphadora, but what she was saying. "Mum," she said angrily. "Don't you think I'm old enough to make my own decisions? I'm an adult, so don't you think I should be allowed to make decisions and plans for myself?" she asked.

Her mother sighed. "Yes, I do understand that you are old enough to make your own decisions- you have been for ages! - But I- your father and I- believe that we _should_ have a say in this whole situation. And, well, I personally believe that you are making one of the greatest mistakes in your life!" she finished.

"And your father thinks you're right, Dora," Ted said quietly. "You _are_ old enough to make your own decisions, but the only thing I'm not happy about is the man you've fallen in love with is a _werewolf_." he said the last word quietly, as though it were cursed.

"But he's isn't _that _bad!" insisted Tonks. "It's all just prejudice that _all_ werewolves are bad! The Ministry are absolutely _horrible_ to _all_ werewolves, because they are all apparently bad!" she screamed. Tonks shoved her plate away from her. "I'm not hungry," she mumbled to her parents, who looked shocked after her sudden outburst. "Thank you, any way." she added, standing up and going into the living room.

Her mother started whispering to her father then; she stood up and followed her daughter into the living room. "Honey, you've changed so much," she said with tears in her eyes.

"You would have too, if you fell in love with someone that no body approved." Tonks mumbled with her arms and legs crossed tightly.

"I – _everybody_ misses the old you- the cheerful you, the bubbly you. We get friends and family asking what's happened to you, but we just can't answer them, because we don't even know. Darling, I mean, you can't even change your appearance anymore!" her mother said.

"Well, how do you know I _can't_ change my appearance at will?" Tonks snapped. "Who says that I just don't want to anymore?" she asked furiously.

"Well, I- er- I've seen you try to change your looks, quite a few times, then, when you can't, you start cursing and mumbling about why you can't." her mother said quietly.

Tonks wanted to scream; it felt as though her mother had kept a deep dark secret about her past from her, and she'd only just found out about it. But she still found reality just as heart wrenching; her mother had been spying on her; looking in on her to see what see was doing, behind her back! Tonks felt like she was blinded by rage; she wanted to kick and rip and tear and scream! But, instead she managed to swallow her anger and rage, and just looked at her mother. "How long have you been spying on me?" she asked quietly, trying to keep her fury inside her.

Her mother looked at her. "Ever since Sirius died," she answered quietly. "Ever since you came back from St Mungo's hospital," she continued. "You were just so different, and I thought you were just grieving over Sirius –which I know was partially true, but I soon suspected it was something different," she said. "I'm so, so sorry Tonks. I was just looking out for you; I'm your mother, and I care for you more than anything else in the world. I was worried about you, Dora." That was one of the first times her mother had ever called Tonks 'Dora'. It was _always_ her father's name for her; not her mothers. Still, Tonks was touched; her mother usually wasn't _this_ sympathetic.

"Oh, mum!" Tonks said with tears in her eyes. She launched herself from her perch on the couch and hugged her mother. Dromeda looked bewildered; her was mouth hanging open and she also had tears in her eyes, then, she hugged her daughter back, patting her on the shoulder as she was doing so.

Half an hour after Tonks and Dromeda had had their 'heart to heart', Ted and Tonks were playing exploding snap once more. They managed to play quite a few more games until Tonks gave up and decided it was time for her to go home.

"Come on, Dora!" her dad said pleadingly. "Just a couple more games and then you can stay here again tonight." he looked at her with a pleading expression.

Tonks chuckled; her father looked like a schoolboy pleading for something from the sweet shop. "Oh, all right then!" she said giving in. "But, I really shouldn't stay the night again; I would just be intruding on your lives." she looked at her parents.

Her mother smiled sympathetically. "Intruding?" she asked, bewildered. "How could our daughter; our only child, intrude in our lives? We love getting visits from you, Nymphadora! It's even more of a pleasure to have you stay over."

Tonks considered it for a moment. _"What's the problem with staying over again?"_ she thought. _"And my parents must get lonely, so, they obviously like having me over."_ Tonks came to a consensus. "Well, all right, then!" she said happily, going back to playing exploding snap with Ted. "Thank you, by the way." she added.

Her mother and father smiled. "It's no problem." they said together happily. "It's always nice to see you; we don't mind what mood you're in, or anything. We love seeing you, Dora. And we love you, so, so much." Ted said.

What her father said to Tonks meant a lot to her. She wanted to cry tears of happiness, even though she knew she wasn't going to be very happy later on; most likely tomorrow if she saw Remus. But she didn't mind; now was the present; the gift, so she was going to treasure it.

A few hours lather, Tonks and her father had finished their 'tournament' of exploding snap the family of three were talking in the living room.

"Well, I'm going to be going to bed now," Tonks said with a large yawn. "Goodnight mum, dad." Tonks's parents hugged their daughter in turn and then watched her go down the hallway to the guest bedroom.

"_This room is coming more of my room."_ Tonks thought happily. She threw herself onto the large bed, cheerful at the fact she hadn't been this happy for months. A few minutes later, there was a knock on the door.

"What? Oh, come in." she said, confused.

Her mother entered. "Tonks, I cannot keep stressing that if you go into a relationship with Remus, you will just get hurt." she said hurriedly.

Tonks was in too good of a mood to yell. "Mum, I know you're concerned; I'm scared too, Remus is scared. But I promise you," she said looking into her mothers eyes. "I _promise_ that if I do get into a serious relationship with him, I will not get hurt. Trust me." she said. "Please." Tonks added pleadingly.

"Ok, you know what, Tonks? I am going to trust you, but to ensure nothing does happen between you and him, I am forbidding you to see him." Dromeda said.

"What? That is _not_ fair! This is my life, not yours!" Tonks said furiously. "I _will_ see him, no matter what you say. He heals me, and we are actually good friends, thank you very much." she said curtly.

Her mother sighed deeply. "Goodnight, Tonks." she said, closing the door.

Tonks wanted to scream. _How_ could her mother say such horrible things to her? She tossed and turned for a few minutes, in a desperate quest to get comfortable and to sleep.

Eventually, Tonks was in a comfortable position; buried under a pile of duvets and pillows.

"_I do not care what my parents say,"_ she thought determinedly. _"I will see Remus; I see him most days. He heals me, and even though he doesn't think he's the right guy for me; he is. He always will be. We will be together, in one form or another. Even if we don't have a serious relationship, I will always be friends with Lupin."_

She smiled slightly, thinking of her and Remus in a serious relationship; at their wedding.

Tonks woke with a start the next morning. She didn't know why; one moment she was sleeping deeply, still covered in a mass pile of duvets, then, the next, she was getting woken up by someone tapping her face lightly.

She groaned. "Whozere?" she mumbled, half asleep.

"It is me, Remus." said a male's voice.

Tonks's eyes shot open. What was he doing here? "What're you doing here?" she asked, more awake this time.

"I thought I would just pop in to say hello to your parents, then they asked me if I could wake you up, because breakfast is ready," he replied. "Both your parents said something about you not getting as angry at me for waking you up as you would with them waking you up."

Tonks looked at Lupin, and laughed at his bewildered face.

"Well I guess that is partially true!" she said, still laughing. "I would've been well… pretty angry if my parents had woken me up," she smiled at him. "I guess I'm still like a teenager!" Tonks added. "Well, thanks anyway, Remus," she said, still smiling. "Are you going to be staying for breakfast?" she asked him.

"Well, I guess I could if you wanted me to." Lupin replied with a smile.

He walked through the open door out into the hallway and went to the living room. Tonks began to follow then burst out into a fit of giggles. She had just realised something; her mother had either forgotten about the restrictions she had given her daughter, or she had lifted them. Either way, Tonks was happy that she was able to see the person she was in love with.

Tonks walked into the dining room, stretching and yawning.

"Oh, good morning, mum, good morning dad." Ted and Dromeda hugged their daughter.

"Good morning, Dora!" her dad said cheerfully.

Her mother was a little more tired. She yawned. "Good morning, darling," she said in the middle of a yawn. "Sleep well?" she asked.

"Really good," replied Tonks. "Who knew that being buried under a pile of duvets and pillows was comfortable?" she said in wonder. Everybody in the kitchen laughed. "Oh, yeah, mum, I forgot to tell you, but um, I invited Lupin to stay for breakfast," Tonks could tell that her mother wasn't very impressed with her daughters invite, but thankfully she didn't show it. "And, well, he said yes." Tonks looked at Lupin, and he gave her a little smile, and mouthed the words 'thank you'. Tonks gave him a small wink.

"Only if I'm allowed to stay." Lupin said quietly.

Before Dromeda could protest, Ted spoke. "Yes, that's fine, my boy!" he replied to Remus, smiling.

Lupin smiled back. "Thank you very much." he said.

A few minutes later, Dromeda was in the kitchen, and Tonks, her father and Lupin were talking in the living room.

"Breakfast is ready!" her mother called from the kitchen.

"Good, I'm starving!" exclaimed Ted.

"Mm, me too!" agreed Tonks.

Remus stayed quiet, but he and Tonks walked side by side into the dining room, where the table was laden with all sorts of Tonks's favourite breakfast foods. She licked her lips, absent minded. There was bacon, eggs, toast, orange juice, pumpkin juice….. "Yum." Tonks said quietly.

Lupin heard her. "Yes….. yum." he agreed, quietly, but just loud enough for Tonks to hear.

She caught his eye and gave him a small, shy smile. Lupin smiled back broadly. Lupin drew a chair from the table for Tonks to sit on with a lazy flick of his wand. Then, once she had sat down, he pushed it back to the table with another lazy flick. Remus then sat down next to Nymphadora.

"Why did you do that?" she asked curiously.

"I was being a gentlemen." he replied sarcastically, puffing out his chest.

Tonks giggled. "Well, thanks anyway." she whispered to him.

"No problem." Lupin replied.

And then, they ate. A lot. Tonks had not eaten this well in ages, she realised. Also, she hadn't had such a great tasting breakfast in even longer. She devoured the food gratefully; she hadn't realised how hungry she was, especially considering that she had barely any dinner the night before.

Within half an hour, Tonks was helping her mother in the kitchen (although she didn't know _why_ her mother needed help for she would've been able to finish the dishes in moments with a flick of her wand).

"Mum, I don't really see as to why you need my help," Tonks begun, but she soon realised why her mother wanted her to 'help'; she wanted to talk to Tonks alone. Tonks gulped when her mother opened her mouth to speak, but before she could speak, Tonks spoke.

"Mum, please, just don't yell at me for inviting Remus to breakfast while he's here," she blurted out quickly. "I know you aren't happy with what I did, but how is it going to hurt anyone? I don't think he even sees _his_ family much, so why can we not just pretend that he's like part of the family just _sometimes_?"

Her mother sighed. She put a hand on her daughter's cheek, and Tonks looked away. She didn't want to look into her mothers eyes, not just then, anyway.

"Nymphadora," she said quietly.

"Please don't call me that mum." Tonks said furiously, still not meeting her mothers gaze.

Her mother hesitated, and then began again. "Tonks," she sighed. "I know how you feel, ok? That's how I felt when your father and I got together; my parents forbade it because he was a muggle; if I had children, they wanted them to be pure blood. Tonks, my parents were selfish; they wanted us children to marry successful pure bloods. And, you will probably find it hard to believe but," Tonks cut her off.

"And you rebelled against them." Tonks finished off her mothers sentence quietly. "So why will you not let me?" she asked. "With Lupin." Tonks added quietly.

"Because you are my daughter, Nymphadora, and I love you so much. I don't want to see you get hurt mentally or physically," Dromeda said. "I love you too much to risk seeing you get hurt," she said quietly. "OK, end of discussion," her mother said abruptly. "By the way, I forgive you, Nymphadora, for asking Lupin to stay for a meal, but, next time, just ask us."

Tonks nodded and she went into the living room to join Lupin and her father.

Lupin stood up. "Well, I should really be going now, Ted," he said to Tonks's father. "Thank you very much for letting me stay for breakfast, Andromeda," Lupin called to the kitchen at Dromeda. Then, he went close enough for just Tonks to hear what he said next. "And thank _you_ for inviting me." Remus said to Tonks quietly. He smiled, and winked at her. She smiled and winked back.

Lupin turned to walk across the living room to the front door. "Er- wait!" Tonks said.

Lupin turned around. "Yes, Tonks?" he asked patiently.

"Do- do you think I could come with you?" she asked, edging closer to him. "My parents are really getting on my nerves, and I think it would do us all some good if I got out of the house for a while." Tonks whispered.

He hesitated. "Well…. Oh, all right then." Lupin said with a smile.

Ted looked worried, then he went over to Tonks and whispered in her ear. "Dora, I know you aren't happy with what your mother said, so I'm going to cover for you," he said with a smile. "But this is the only time." Ted added sternly.

Tonks nodded. "Thank you so, very much!" she said to her father gratefully

Her father nodded. "Now get out of here then!" he said. "And have a good time."

"Thank you!" Tonks said a second time.

"Hurry!" whispered her father. "Your mother's coming now!"

Then, the next minute, Tonks was getting pulled through the front door by Lupin.

He whispered in her ear. "OK, now, we're going to do side along apparation," he said. "I want the place we're going to be a surprise." Lupin held out his arm and Tonks took it, her heart soaring. Lupin was taking her to a place where she didn't know. Maybe he did care?


	6. Chapter 6: Lupin

**Authors Note: Thanks so much to everyone who has been reading and reviewing my story! :D I love it so much =P Please continue!**

**My sister, whose pen-name is Kaylakay HP Bookworm has also written a Harry Potter fanifc (about Hermione and Draco), called "Why do you care?" **

**It would be awesome if you could check it out**

**Thanks again guys! :D :D**

CHAPTER 6

LUPIN

They had just landed in Hogsmeade. Tonks stumbled, and fell into Lupin's arms.

"What are we doing here?" she asked. "I'm not being ungrateful or anything!" she added hastily.

Remus chuckled. "I didn't think you _were_ being ungrateful," he said to her. "I thought you were merely being curious," he looked at her, and grinned. "Well, I thought we could pop down to see Madam Rosmerta in the three broomsticks, then maybe get something to drink. I dunno, butterbeer, fire whisky…. I'll let you choose." he said to Tonks.

She looked rather confused. "Um….. Ok…?" she said, absolutely bewildered (although she didn't know why she felt so confused).

Lupin clapped his hands together. _"This is much more awkward than I expected it to be."_ he thought.

"Ok, well, then, shall we get going then, Tonks?" he asked.

She nodded. "Ok." was all she said.

"_This is really, really hard! Why is she not normal today?"_ Lupin thought, feeling frustrated. _"What am I doing wrong? Whatever it is, I am going to make the most of today; I'm going to give her a day/date thing to remember." _Lupin didn't like calling him going on an outing with Tonks a 'date', but he thought that was the best thing to call it. _"No,"_ he thought. _"I'll just call it an outing."_ he gave a small nod. That sounded much better; an outing with Tonks, not a _date. _

Lupin and Tonks were struggling to walk to the three broomsticks, for they were being buffeted by the wind.

"I cannot wait till we get indoors!" yelled Tonks over the howl of the wind.

Lupin nodded. "Me too!" he agreed.

At last, they had reached the three broomsticks.

"Wow, that was some crazy wind!" exclaimed Tonks, panting.

"I know what you mean," came a voice from behind the bar. A beautiful looking woman came into view. "Hey, Lupin, Tonks," Madam Rosmerta said. "What can I get you two?" she asked.

"Wotcher Rosmerta!" said Tonks. "Um, I'll have a butterbeer, and Lupin, what will you have?" she asked him.

"I'll just have the same as you, Tonks," he said. "By the way, I'm paying." Lupin said with a smile.

"Ar- are you sure?" Tonks asked, looking embarrassed. "I mean, I _can_ pay if you like,"

Lupin raised his hand so Tonks stopped talking. "Yes, I'm sure, Tonks," he said, smiling. "My treat." he added.

Tonks smiled back. "o-OK," she said shyly. "Thank you." she added.

"Don't mention it," Lupin replied, still smiling. "Shall we go sit down?" Lupin asked.

Tonks nodded. Remus paid 2 galleons and 10 sickles for the two butterbeers and went to go join Tonks.

"Thanks," she said with a smile, opening her bottle.

"Cheers," Lupin said, touching her bottle with his.

Then, they drank.

"Yum," Tonks said, licking her lips. "This is delicious, Remus! Thank you." she said again with a smile.

"Its no problem Tonks," he said "Seriously," he added. "I mean, it's just a drink!"

"OK, then," Tonks said with an impish grin. "Thanks!" she said cheekily.

Remus sighed playfully. "It is _absolutely_ fine!" he said with a chuckle.

Lupin sighed discreetly, so Tonks didn't hear or notice. _"Why can Tonks not be like this every day?"_ he thought sadly. _"I know she used to be bubbly every single day; almost to a point where we begun to got annoyed!" _Lupin chuckled affectionately as recounted this memory.

"Lupin?" called Tonks distantly.

Lupin wrenched himself back to the present. "Hm? Oh, yes Tonks?" he asked vaguely.

"Er- you- you were daydreaming," she said. "Did you use that dream charm you gave me?" she asked looking serious.

He looked at her, with a confused air around him. "Um, no…" he said, his voice trailing off. He looked at Tonks, and the seriousness in her face had not broken. Then, she burst into a fit of giggles. "Oh, I'm just _joking_ Remus!" she said between laughs.

Lupin laughed awkwardly. "Aha ha! Yes, of course you were." he said with a smile.

"Thank you, Lupin," Tonks said suddenly.

"For what?" he asked, having not the slightest idea as to why she was thanking him.

"For everything," she said simply. "You've always been there, it seems, and I've never really respected that very much," she said to him, looking embarrassed. "So, thank you, for everything." Tonks said, with a small smile.

Lupin felt speechless. What was he _supposed _to say? Remus felt he was bound to say the wrong thing, so he picked his words extremely carefully. "Er-, tha-that's f-fine," he began. "I- I'm glad you think I'm always there for you," he continued, hoping that he was picking the right words. "And, well, I will be there for you, whenever you need me." Lupin finished with a small smile, almost identical to Tonks's.

He was surprised to see that Tonks had tears in her eyes. _"Uh-oh."_ he thought. _"Did I say the wrong thing? Why is she crying?"_ he was getting rather worried by then. _"Why do I always manage to stuff things up!"_ he thought angrily.

"Tonks," he said quietly. "Ar- are you Ok?" he asked cautiously.

She nodded. Tonks turned around, and Lupin could see her wiping tears from her face.

"Oh, god, did I say something to offend you?" Lupin groaned.

"What? Oh, no, of course you didn't," she said with a small, watery smile. "It's just, I've been so-so _depressed_ for what seems months, and you saying such sweet, touching things like what you said before, it, it just raises my spirits," she said, with a look of full meaning in her face. "Thank you." Tonks added, with a small smile.

Lupin smile back, and looked at the table, almost determined not to make eye contact with her. He sighed, and shook his head slightly. Then, he finally looked at her. "I am honoured," he replied, still smiling. "I am so honoured that it is me that raises your spirits," he continued, trying once again with all his might to select the right words. "Lately, just the fact that you are happy, even if it isn't fully, makes everyone-especially me- just ecstatic. And I know I have said this many, _many_ times but, I just cannot stress it enough that it gets through to you. Tonks," he said, looking her in the eyes with full meaning. "Tonks, I am _not_ the right man for you," he said gently. "I know you think that I am, but its just, I- I _don't _think I'm that person. You know the reasons why I think this Tonks, and I'm not going to repeat them. But, there is another reason," he said, feeling absolutely horrible with the words he was about to say next. "Tonks, I _don't want_ to be with _you_." Lupin looked at the ground, knowing that Tonks was going to start shouting at him at any moment.

"How _dare_ you?" she exclaimed in pure anger.

"Tonks!" he said hastily. "This is for your own safety and well being!" he said, feeling the anger rising up in him. He let the anger pass, then continued to speak. "Tonks," he said as calmly as his anger would let him. He swallowed. "Tonks, I care too much about you. If I hurt you in any way, I would _never_ _ever_ be able to forgive myself." Remus hoped what he said had done the trick. Unluckily for him, it didn't.

Tonks stood up, so quickly and furiously that her old wooden chair fell behind her. "You're hurting me right now!" she screamed at the top of her lungs. Tonks stormed out of the Three Broomsticks. The door swung wildly for a few seconds, then it slammed shut.

Lupin groaned, and slammed his head on the table.

"I guess I should probably talk to her, then." he muttered to himself.

Lupin ignored all the curious looks from everyone, said a hurried 'thank you' to Madame Rosmerta and hurried out the door.

"Where _has_ she gone to?" he murmured to himself. Lupin was angry with himself.

"_Why did I have to say those horrid things?"_ he thought haughtily. _"I need to find her, and say I'm sorry. Why does this always happen to Tonks and I?" _Lupin ran toward Honeydukes, the ever so famous sweet store.

"Tonks?" he called, Lupin knew it wasn't going to help, but continued, so he felt like he was doing at least _one_ thing useful.

After a few minutes of useless calling and running around, Lupin saw a flash a mouse brown hair.

He shook his head in annoyance. Then, he ran down the alleyway where he thought Tonks had gone.

"Tonks?" he called again, louder and more furiously.

He ducked around the corner. "Tonks, please let me talk to you." Lupin said, but secretly hoping that she wouldn't let him, because he had no idea of what he was going to say.

"What?" came a muffled voice from behind a mass of rubbish. "Look, Lupin I don't want to talk right now, so can you _please_ piss off!" she said angrily.

Remus went around the large pile of rubbish to find Tonks curled with her knees tucked into her chin. She had been crying. A lot. Lupin gave her a sympathetic smile. "Tonks," he said quietly and softly. "You are an amazing woman, and I don't deserve you; you deserve someone who is young, not someone who's poor, dangerous and thirteen years older than you like I am."

Tonks swore at him loudly, and tried to get past him.

Remus held her down. "I'm not letting you go that easily." he said, bemused.

"And I'm not going to give up that easily!" muttered Tonks through clenched teeth.

Tonks scowled up at him. Lupin felt guilty. "Look, Tonks, can you please just stop for _two_ minutes so I can explain mysely and _then_ you can go," he said.

Suddenly, Tonks went limp, and Lupin decided she had calmed down enough for him to let her go. "Ok," she said haughtily. "Hurry up." Tonks snapped unhappily.

"I don't want to hurt you, Tonks, and that is why I said those horrible things to you back there," Tonks continued to scowl. "And I thoroughly regret saying those thing to you," he added. "But, like I said, if I hurt you in any way possible, or-or _killed_ you, I would never be able to forgive myself. I-I would probably commit suicide if I did end up hurting you!" he looked at Tonks, and her facial expressions were unchanged.

"Ok, I get it," she said slowly.

"Really? Yo- you do?" he asked eagerly.

"Yes, I do," she sniffed. "You don't want me," she said simply. "So- so I'll just go now." she said with a little nod.

Remus groaned. "Tonks, it-its not that," he began.

"Goodbye, Lupin." she said vaguely.

"_This is even worse than her bawling her eyes out!"_ he thought angrily. Lupin watched Tonks walk in a dream-like trance out of the alleyway.

"_Argh, she'll get over herself,"_ he thought, feeling his temper rising. _"I'll just talk to her tomorrow; she'll probably be fine by then."_ Lupin tried his best to get over what had just happened, and how Tonks had just acted, and, he too walked out of the dank alleyway.

Lupin passed Honeydukes, and was continuing to walk on the paved path when he checked his watch. He groaned. It was Molly's birthday that day, and he'd promised her that he would go and see her.

"_I should really get her a gift,"_ he thought, still feeling down-even more so because he was certain that Tonks would also be at the Burrow celebrating Molly's birthday. _"Ah, well, I'll just give her a bit of money,"_ he thought. _"Actually, I am going to get her a Gilderoy Lockheart book!"_ he chuckled, fondly remembering how Gilderoy had his memory charm backfired at Hogwarts the year before Lupin taught there. _"Ah, Gilderoy had his own memory wiped, instead of Ronald Weasley's."_

Lupin soon reached the Hogsmeade train station. There, he turned on the spot, and disapparated to Diagon Alley for the second time in two days.

"Whoa." Lupin had landed, and felt incredibly dizzy.

"_Why?"_ he thought. _"Why am I feeling so diorented?"_ Soon, the answer came to him. Lupin smiled. _"Ah. I've just been getting myself worked up about Tonks…again,"_ he thought, feeling thoroughly angry and frustrated at Tonks at that moment.

He soon gained balance, and went to Flourish and Blots, to find the perfect book for Molly. Lupin didn't want to think about Tonks at all; not the argument they had had the day before, and especially not the one they'd had just before. He reached the front door, and a little bell tinkled.

"Hiya, Lupin!" called a voice.

Lupin looked. It was Fred Weasley. "Ah, hello, Fred!" he said as cheerfully as possible. "I'm just finding a present for your dear mother, do you know anything in particular that she might be interested in?" he asked.

"Haha, I'm looking for a gift for her too," Fred smiled sheepishly. "I don't think she'll want any of mine and George's things. Why don't we look together?" he asked Lupin.

Lupin nodded. "So, is business going well?" he asked.

Fred nodded vigorously. "It's going excellent!" he replied enthusiastically.

"That's good," Lupin said, absent minded. "Ah, here we are! Gilderoy Lockheart books!" he caught Fred's eye, then they both burst into fits of laughter.

"Ok, then!" agreed Fred. "It'll give her a laugh, and I think she's still in love with him."

Lupin chuckled, and he selected a book that sounded just like Molly's taste; _'Growing your own magical fungi- a book with tips and recipes for your grown mushrooms'_. He chuckled.

"D'you think she'll like this?" he called to Fred, holding up the book.

Fred, who was also looking at the Gilderoy Lockheart books looked up and nodded. He chuckled. "She _will _like that indeed."

A few minutes later, George came in, and he and Fred chose their gift for their mother.

"Well, I better get going to The Burrow," Lupin said reluctantly; he'd been having fun with the Weasley twins. "I will see you there, I presume?" he asked.

Fred and George nodded. "Of course you will!" they said together. "See ya Lupin!" they said.

Lupin nodded and said goodbye, then he tried to clear his mind –so he would travel better- and prepared to disapparate to the Burrow.

The Weasley's house was brightly lit, and there was a lot of noise coming from inside. He hesitated, and walked up to the front door. Lupin put his hand up to knock on the door, but realised he hadn't wrapped Molly's present. He flicked his wand quickly and wrapping paper appeared out of nowhere, and stuck itself to the book. Then, bright pink ribbon snaked around the wrapped package and entwined itself around it. Then, he knocked. Ron, Hermione and Harry all answered the door.

Lupin smiled; three of his favourite students, even though professors weren't supposed to have favourites.

Harry's face lit up. "Lupin!" he cried out, smiling broadly.

Remus shook all three of their hands and proceeded inside.

"_They all looked almost exactly like they did the day they walked into my classroom,"_ Lupin thought affectionately. _"Except maybe a bit taller."_ And it was true; Ron, Hermione and Harry looked very similar to how they did those three years ago. Ron was still tall and lanky, his orange hair blazing. Hermione still had her bushy brown hair and her book-smart looks. And Harry. Harry still looked exactly like his father, except he had his mother's eyes.

"When are you three starting school?" he asked them.

"In a few days," Harry replied. "But Hermione and I are staying with Ron's family for the rest of the holidays- we've been staying here for a couple of weeks now.

"Where's your mother?" he asked Ron, after asking how they all were.

"Um," he said, looking absolutely bewildered. "I-I think she's over there," he said pointing through a doorway that led to the living room.

"Right, thanks," Lupin said, smiling. "Er-, d-do you guys know if Tonks is here?" he asked, trying to make it sound as casual as possible.

Ron shrugged. So did Harry. "Um, I…" said Hermione, scanning the room they were in. She looked at him. "She is here," she finally said, with a small, knowledgeable nod. "Right there."

Lupin looked to where she was pointing. For a moment, he forgot everything; where he was, who he was with….. he could only focus on Tonks, and she looked stunning in his eyes. She was wearing a deep red dress that came below her knees. It had frills around the bottom of it and at the arms. There were no sleeves, but the frills covered her shoulders. Her hair had been curled, and was in ringlets, covering her shoulders. It bounced so gracefully when she moved her head. It was then, that Remus realised something; _had Tonks gotten her ability as a metamorphis back?_ There was only one way to find out.

It was only then that Lupin realised that Ron, Hermione and Harry were all staring at him, all looking confused. He tried to ignore it. "Thanks," he said with a small nod, smiling broadly. "I'll see you three around tonight, I presume?"

They all nodded, and Lupin went to go talk to Tonks, completely forgetting about seeing Molly and wishing her a happy birthday. And giving her the present. All he could focus on right then was Tonks; he didn't know why, and he didn't know how long he would be locked under this spell that was caused by her immense beauty.

Lupin didn't know what he was doing. That afternoon he had just had a massive argument with her, and it was obvious that Tonks had been upset greatly. And then, right then he was approaching her, wanting nothing more than to just talk to her. He was standing in front of her, preparing himself to speak to her, but not able to find the words.

"_What the hell am I doing?"_ he thought to himself furiously, but found he was glued to the spot; unable to move until he had the chance to speak to Tonks. _"I am going to get so much crap for this…"_ he thought reluctantly, but, still unable to move, he soon realised that he should just talk to her and at least say how sincerely sorry he was about that days events….. And comment on how stunningly beautiful she was.

Uh-oh… Tonks had just noticed him, standing there making a huge fool of himself.

"Oh, er- hi, Lupin," she said.

"_The beginning of a very awkward conversation. And an unsuccessful one too."_ Lupin thought, felling thoroughly frustrated.

He put on his best smile-or tried to anyway. "Hey, Tonks," he said, trying his best to sound casual and cheerful; acting like he didn't have a trouble in the world, especially as though he hadn't just had a massive argument with the woman he was talking to. Tonks didn't look very impressed. _At all._ Lupin dropped the smile. "Look, Tonks," he said sympathetically. "I- I am so, so, very sincerely sorry about what I said earlier on today. But, even though I hurt you with my words, it is nothing compared to how I fear I will hurt you if we did begin a serious relationship. I-I just don't think it'll work the way you-and I- would plan to," he looked at her, and, partially expecting to see her crying, was surprised that she was looking at him with an meaningful look on her face. "Tonks," he said, looking down at his feet. "I really like you –a-as a friend though. And I think us being together would ruin that!" he said, still trying to get her to see that it wasn't going to work if they got together.

Tonks finally spoke. "But you don't understand!" she said, angrily, upset, and a little too loudly. Quite a few people had stopped talking and were all staring at them both.

"Er- there's nothing to see or hear here folks!" Lupin said, starting to feel extremely frustrated. _Why did this always have to happen when he talked to Tonks?_

"Thanks!" Tonks whispered. "Now…." She said, still whispering, but she didn't sound very happy. "Now, Remus. I still find this very embarrassing to admit to you, but…. I-I'm in love with _you_. I think you're the right one for me; I don't care if you are thirteen years older than me, or if you're a werewolf, or-or any of that other trash you said was wrong with you. In my eyes, you are perfect, and I don't know how I'm going to get over this all, but I know I'll be able to heal myself with you beside me. I love you Remus Lupin." Tonks said with a small smile, still whispering. Before Lupin could speak, Tonks had walked off.

"_Argh. Why does that always happen?" _he thought furiously. _"We always only say bad things to each other! Well, at least, I only say bad things to her… I thought that was going to change tonight, but I didn't get to say how beautiful she looked tonight."_ Lupin sighed, and his shoulders slumped.

"Oh, crap!" he muttered furiously to himself. Lupin reached into his jacket and pulled out the neatly wrapped gift for Molly. He looked around; the kitchen was crowded with people, and most of them he knew. He spotted Hagrid, which wasn't hard to do, since he was so massive.

"Hello, Hagrid!" he said cheerfully, but this time, he wasn't faking it; he was happy to see the half giant.

"Ar, hello Remus!" Hagrid replied, sounding just as happy as Remus. "How are you?" he asked.

"Ah, I'm alright, thanks, Hagrid. Yourself?"

"I am very well, thank you, Remus, now, do you know where Nymphadora is? I believe she isn't the happiest at the moment and wanted to cheer her up."

Lupin rolled his eyes. It was always about her. _Always._ And to make matters worse, Lupin still felt responsible for Tonks's 'sadness'. "Um, I don't, actually, Hagrid," he replied eventually. "I was talking to her before but, I don't know where she went off to….." Lupin's voice trailed off, and he quickly scanned the kitchen, to see if she was there.

"Look, I'd better go give this," he pointed to the wrapped book. "To Molly. I forgot to give it to her when I first got here, and I don't even know if she knows I'm here."

Hagrid chuckled. "Ok, then, Remus. I will see you later then."

Lupin agreed, then went to the Living Room to find Molly.

"Ah, Remus!" Molly said, hugging Lupin tightly. "I'm so glad you could make it!" she was smiling broadly.

Lupin smiled back. "Happy Birthday Molly," he said sheepishly, handing her the gift. "I-I hope you like it." Lupin said with a small smile.

Molly unwrapped the book and looked at the cover, her mouth gaping open. "Oh my, this is _exactly _what I wanted!" she cried happily. "Thank you so, so, very much Lupin!" she said enthusiastically. A little too enthusiastic, though, he thought personally.

He chuckled at Molly. "That is quite all right, Molly," he said between laughs. "I'm just glad you like it."

"Like it?" she asked, bemused. "I _love _it!" she cried happily.

She hugged him again, and Lupin looked behind her shoulder. Uh-oh….. Tonks was coming…..

"Er- Oh! Molly, looks like Tonks is here to see you!" he said cheerfully, steering Tonks by her shoulders to stand in front of Molly. She scowled, and crossed her arms tightly across her chest. He rubbed his hands together. "Well, I'll leave you two to talk then!" he said happily. "I will see you around Molly, Tonks."

Lupin walked across the cramped living room and went outside.

He sighed a sigh of relief. "Whew. _That _was a close one." Lupin looked up to the sky and saw the Dog Star, Sirius. He smiled. It made his feel happy; like his old friend was watching over him. He sighed and hung his head, almost feeling shameful. "What do I do?" he muttered to himself, but partially talking to the star too, even though he felt like a complete idiot. "She loves me. Out of all people, _why_ does it have to be _me_? I'm not good enough for her. But, whenever I see her, something weird happens. I feel so funny; all happy, but confused, and all these other feelings at the same time…. It- it's so hard to contain all of them at once," he sighed. "I don't know what to do."

"That's what happens when you have true feeling for someone."

Lupin whipped his head around. "Molly? How long were you listening to me for?" he demanded angrily.

She smiled. "Long enough," she said simply. "To find out that you do, in fact like Tonks." Molly was beaming.

Lupin scowled. "I don't like her!" he cried out angrily. "Sorry Molly, but I have to go, and if you think I like her, then please, do me a favour and keep it to yourself."

Lupin stormed out of the yard, buried in fury. _"How could she think something like that?"_ he thought angrily. He stopped abruptly in his tracks, finally realising, knowing that, eventually, _soon_, he would have to express his true feelings to Tonks, no matter how small or large they were.


	7. Chapter 7: Tonks

**Authors Note: Hiya Guys! Well, here's chapter 7! Please review and tell me what you think, because reviews are my motivation: it's what keeps me going, and the chapters will come a lot quicker! Thanks for reading and enjoy! :) **

CHAPTER 7

TONKS

"Molly?" Tonks called over and over; because for one minute, she was talking to Molly, and the next, she had disappeared within a large group of people that were moving… somewhere.

"Tonks!" someone called from across the living room. "Tonks! Did you finally get you metamorphis abilities back?" the stranger with fiery red hair approached her.

"Oh, it's you, Ginny. I didn't recognise you! How did you know my abilities were well… failing?" she asked Molly's youngest child and only daughter, feeling both annoyed and curious.

"_Everyone _knows about it!" exclaimed Ginny. "And, well, er- mum told me and Hermione a couple of days ago," she smiled guiltily. "But never mind about that! _Did_ you get your abilities back?" she asked eagerly.

Tonks chuckled. "Nope," she said simply. Ginny gaped at her. Then she started laughing.

"What are you talking about?" she asked in between laughs. "Then how did you make your hair so …spindly and attractive?" the teenager asked testily.

"I used the muggle way," Tonks said with a sarcastic nod, not smiling. "They're called curlers. It was quite good; a replacement you could call it, and a good one, just until I find the ability to change my appearance again."

She looked at Ginny, who was smiling at her in the most _peculiar_ way. "What?" she snapped, feeling embarrassed that she'd told someone of the silly thing she had done before she went the party that night.

"It's just that…" began Ginny quietly. "I think that's really creative and cool, and I think it's a _really_ good idea!" she exclaimed happily. "D'you think I could come to your place one day so you can show me how to do it?" she asked eagerly.

The anger that had been boiling in Tonks suddenly disappeared. She chuckled affectionately. She'd always been fond of Ginny; she was always so curious, and funny; almost like the little sister she had never had- and had _always_ wanted. She hesitated; it was always something she did to get people narked off when they wanted a straight answer there and then. Ginny was the main person she did it with. "Hmmm….." she said, putting on her best thinking face. She acted like a child; he mother always reminded her of that, but why should Tonks care? She didn't care. Tonks acted like a child and was proud of it. It was_ her_ life, sure her mother was _part_ of it, but she didn't _control_ it. "I'd love to!" she cried happily. "When though?" she asked. "Before school starts? Or during some of the holidays?"

Ginny shrugged. "I dunno. But, at least we're both happy to use muggle hair products, then that's a start," she said with a small, matter of fact nod, reminding Tonks so much of Mrs Weasley. "Well, I'd better go now, then, Tonks. I think Hermione, Ron and Harry will start to wonder where I am. It was nice talking to you though!" she said with a small smile. "See ya around, Tonks." Ginny said with a small wave, walking up one of the many flights of stairs that held the Burrow together. Tonks waved back, just before Ginny disappeared into the maze of stairs.

"There you are, Molly!" called Tonks after finally seeing Molly a couple of hours since they had last talked.

"Oh, sorry, dear," Molly said apologetically. "I was just talking to a few different people and got a little side tracked." she said with a guilty smile.

"That's all right." Tonks replied with a slight flick of her hand.

"So, what did you do when I was gone?" Molly asked, trying to make conversation.

"Oh, er- not much, actually!" she replied with a smile. "I looked for you for a while, but, your house if so big and I _still_ get lost in it, so I decided to give up after I while because I knew you'd be back. I talked to a few people though," she had spoken so fast that she wasn't sure if Molly had understood her. "I talked to Hagrid, and Ginny came up to me and we had a chat about muggle hair products! She said she'd be interested in using them so we thought that she could come over to my place one day to try them out," she looked at Molly. "If it's Ok with you, though." Tonks added.

Molly smiled. "That daughter of mine!" she said. "Always so curious; trying new things- all the time too! I'm so proud of her," she looked at Tonks. "Look at me! Raving about my daughter like this."

Tonks smiled. "I like it," she said quietly. "I think it's really nice when parents are as proud of their children as you are" she looked at Molly. "I don't really think my mother is proud of what I've been doing with my life lately. Just the fact that I became an auror, the fact I'm in love with a werewolf….just things like that!"

Molly smiled sympathetically, sadness in her eyes. "Tonks, if you were my daughter, I would be very proud of you. And I can assure you that your mother is very proud of you. Sure, you've done some stupid things, but that's just life. Your mother may seem angry but, you know what, Tonks? It's because she loves you; you are her only child! She wants to protect you," she looked at Tonks. "You might not want to hear this from me, but I am a mother too, you know, and all mothers are basically the same." Molly spoke so quietly, so she was almost impossible to hear, but Tonks thought that it made what she said more meaningful, like it was a secret that was shared between them, only for them and nobody else.

"I'm sorry," was all that Tonks could whisper once Molly had stopped talking.

Molly put her hand on her shoulder. "That's alright dear, now promise –," but her sentence was cut short. Tonks never did find out what Molly was going to say. A scream filled the air, then a sickening silence.

"DEATH EATERS!" a cry- no, many cries came form all over the house. Then there were explosions. Many. Coming from everywhere and everyone. The guests at Molly's party were all fighting to defend themselves, The Burrow and each other.

"RUN!" many people yelled. But that was what Tonks was doing, but she didn't know why. What if Bellatrix, Sirius's killer, was here? Shouldn't she help fight? She skidded to halt, almost running into a few people. Then, she realised; where was Lupin?

"_There's no time to thinks about that!"_ she thought fiercely. "_There's basically a mini war going around me, and I'm doing nothing!"_ she hung her head in shame, then she noticed the person she was looking for; Bellatrix.

"Well, if it isn't Sirius's wittle cousin!" Bellatrix said tauntingly, her wand at the ready. Tonks pulled her wand out too. "And my wittle niece!" she continued in a mock baby tone. "Well, never mind about missing Sirius!" she said, smiling evilly. "I suspect you're going to see him at the place I'm going to send you…. AVADA KAVARDA!" she cried at the top of lungs, aiming the killing curse straight at Tonks. Time went so slowly. Tonks could see the bright green light heading towards her, but wasn't doing anything about it. She thought, that, maybe, it would be easier for everyone if she wasn't alive, but not today. She cried out Protego, and, thankfully, her life had been saved. Just. The killing curse rebounded off the magic shield and hit one of the other death eaters, who dropped like a statue to the ground, dead.

Tonks gasped, but was soon brought back to her senses and started chasing after Bellatrix. She swore loudly at her as she was running, dodging her evil Aunt's randomly shot spells.

"STUPEFY!" Tonks cried, the stunning spell hitting Bellatrix square in the back. Her aunt fell to the ground immobile. Tonks looked at her. She would never, ever consider this vile woman as her aunt. Never. She glared down at the unconscious, despicable woman then ran to fight off the other Death Eaters.

Tonks had been so busy fighting Bellatrix, getting the revenge she so wished for, that she didn't notice that The Burrow, one of Molly's prides and joys, was on FIRE! She gasped, then felt a sharp pain against the back of her head. Everything went black.

She woke up hours later, not knowing what time it was and feeling strongly light headed. She swore loudly. Aiming questions at whoever was there. Where am I? What else happened last night? How did I get here? Her vision was blurred, and she could still feel a sharp pain at the back of her head whenever she moved it. "Ouch." she muttered, trying to get up, but just stumbling back on the bed due to complete dizziness and disorientation.

"Don't rush yourself too much, now dear," the voice came from somewhere inside the room. Tonks squinted, trying to make out the useless blurred shapes that she could see.

"Who are you?" she mumbled deliriously.

"It's me, Nymphadora," was all the voice had to say.

"_Mother. Great. More telling off."_ Tonks thought haughtily.

"You took a nasty blow to your head last night. Death eaters. The- they burnt down The Burrow, but Molly sent us a message saying that you were unconscious, and your father and I brought you back here.

"How's Molly, then?" Tonks mumbled sleepily. In one word, she felt like _crap_. It was like she had been drinking all night and now had the _worst_ hangover. Thankfully, she was responsible, and this was the first time she'd ever experienced anything of the sort.

"Upset, as you can imagine; the house she and Arthur had raised all their 7 children in has been burnt to the ground!" her mother exclaimed sadly. "But, she isn't injured too badly; in fact, everyone was _very_ fortunate that they only received minor injuries.

"But how did they fight the Death Eaters off, then?" Tonks had so many questions, but just didn't have the energy to ask them all. Thankfully, her mother was sympathetic.

"I don't really know, to be honest," she began thoughtfully. Tonks couldn't see her because she had her eyes closed; her head hurt too much to open them, but she could imagine her mothers face; full of wonder and thought, the expression she always had when she was having trouble answering someone's question. "From what I heard, they just… left. No-one knows why they came, or what or who they wanted, but, once they were apparently satisfied, they left. Apparently nothing is missing-but, then again, it wouldn't really matter; their house is burnt anyway, they just….." Dromeda shrugged. "Don't know," she stopped talking and for the first time since Tonks had woken up, her head felt at least a _little _better. She sighed; she was thoroughly exhausted, although, she didn't know why, she only had an unbearable headache. Her mother started talking again. Tonks wanted to groan, but couldn't find the energy to do so. "Of, course, Molly and Arthur reported the attack to The Ministry, but they didn't bother to do _anything_!" her mother sighed dramatically. "Well, I'll leave you to rest," her mother said. Tonks could feel the weight coming off the bed. "Just call if you need anything," she called from the hallway.

A few minutes later, an ashy coloured owl flew through the open window. Tonks opened her eyes just a crack. Her owl, Tawny, was sitting on the windowsill, with a letter in her beak. Tonks stretched her arm out, and her owl obediently flew across the room and landed on it. She drowsily reached with her other hand to retrieve the letter. She managed to open it-it took a while, but she still did it- and it was only then that she noticed that it was addressed from Hogwarts.

"Oh _Shit_!" she cried out loudly, sitting up.

Her mother ran into the Guest Bedroom-the room that Tonks was staying in. "What? What's wrong Tonks?" she asked, concerned.

"Oh, er- it-its nothing," she said quietly. "I completely forgot," she muttered to herself furiously. "I just got a letter from Dumbledore, reminding me that I'm in the group of Aurors that are supposed to be on duty on the first day of term. It says here that I'm first going to be going on the Hogwarts Express," she smiled to herself; it had been years since she had travelled on the Hogwarts Express. "Then," she continued. "I have to help escort the students up the Hogwarts school," she rested her head on the pillow. "It's in a couple of days," she said to her mother. "Thankfully. That means I'll have time to recover from getting hit in the head with a knock-out spell," she laid her head back on the pillow. "Mother, where's dad?" she asked, only just realising that her father hadn't come in with her mother to see her once that day.

"He's just helping the Weasleys," she replied, and although Tonks wasn't looking at her face, her mother sounded concerned.

"Mum, I'm sure he's fine." Tonks said, trying to reassure her mother.

"I'm sure he's fine too," her mother agreed stubbornly. That was the thing everyone needed to know about Tonks's mother; she always thought _her_ opinion was the right one, and didn't really listen to anyone else's idea. "I'm also sure he'll be back soon; he's been gone for a while."

Tonks opened her eyes, only to see her mother staring at her right in the face. Even though her vision was still blurred Tonks could still tell that Andromeda was crying. "What is it, mum?" she asked quietly, fearful of what her mothers reply was going to be.

Andromeda wiped her eyes. "Tonks, I don't want to see you throw your life away like this," she said in a strained, soft voice.

Tonks rolled her eyes discreetly. _"Here we go again."_ she thought haughtily.

"I understand you love someone- I did too, and it was your father. But, Nymphadora, I don't approve of the man you've fallen in love with. I don't want you to hurt yourself,"

She sighed, and Tonks could just make out her mothers eyes welling with tears.

"Molly said that any mother would be proud of their child," Tonks said quietly, afraid and reluctant of what she was going to say. She hesitated, and looked at her mother. "But, the way you act with me, it's like _you_ aren't proud of _me_; your daughter. Mum, my life is my life; and you're a part of it; you don't run it. I can make my own decisions now. Look, mum, I really appreciate what you're trying to do, but it isn't helping. I may get over Remus, but I may not. That's something I'm not going to decide just yet. I won't decide my future; I'm just going to live life."

Her mother flung her arms around Tonks, hugging her tightly. "Oh, Tonks! I _am_ proud of you!" she exclaimed through sobs. "I'm just not proud of some of the decisions you're making; I don't want to see you to throw your life away. I respect your decisions, even if I don't like them, but firstly becoming an auror and now this!" Andromeda buried her head in her hands. "It's gone too far now, Nymphadora; too far!" she screamed angrily. Before she could continue, though, there was an ear splitting explosion that came from the front of Tonks' parents' house. Her mother jumped up and sprinted down the hall. Then it was silent for a few moments. The seconds ticked by so slowly. Then, there was a blood-curdling scream. Tonks struggled to stand up, then she staggered down the hall as fast as she could. Down the hallway, across the lounge, then she was outside. Everywhere Tonks looked there was smoke, so there wasn't much to see. She squinted into the smoke, making out two silhouettes that were _fighting_? She shook her head, as though trying to clear it, then ran into the thick smoke to the to mysterious fighting figures. But before she could reach them, someone or _something _grabbed her from behind. She retaliated quickly, screaming, scratching, kicking biting, anything to defend herself without her wand, as she hadn't seen it since using it the night before.

"Calm down!" the voice commanded, sounding frustrated.

She stopped everything she was doing. "Lupin?" she said quietly, absolutely confused.

Remus sighed. "Yes," he said. "Now, you're in no fit state to fight, we need to get you back inside.

"What the hell are you doing here, Remus?" she screamed loudly, turning around. She put her arms around his neck, and hugged him, although, she didn't know why. For Tonks, the only reason she could have thought _why_ she did this was because he gave her a sense of security. But what surprised Tonks even more, was that he hugged her back. Not for very long, but very awkwardly.

"Come on now, Tonks!" he said fiercely.

"But what about my parents?" Tonks asked, nearly in tears. She felt so helpless. What if her parents died? What was even happening?

"I'll explain everything once we get inside!" Lupin said over the noise of spells being cast. "Don't worry, your parents will be fine." he said, as though reading her thoughts. It was all a matter of skill; being able to manoeuvre around the randomly shot spells, or being able to avoid them. Unfortunately for Tonks, she was still feeling dizzy and disorientated, and was, on top of that, a complete klutz to begin with, made her journey back to the safety inside her parents house a lot more difficult.

"Ow!" Lupin cried out suddenly.

"What? What is it?" Tonks asked, groping around blindly. She touched his arm, and he screamed out in pain.

"My arm! I- I think it's broken," he said, staggering slightly. "I think someone's spell must have hit it."

Tonks sighed, putting Lupin's unbroken arm around her shoulder for extra support. "Come on," she said quietly. "Let's get you inside.

Lupin didn't answer. He just stood there limply, looking at the ground. Finally, he said, "I'm sorry," sounding defeated, and also hanging his head in what looked like shame.

Tonks stopped walking-or staggering- and glared at Lupin. "What for?" she asked, her eyes narrowed.

Lupin sighed. "Everything," he said simply.

Tonks looked at her feet. "Let's talk about this inside." she said quietly.

Lupin staggered inside, holding onto Tonks for support. She led him over to the couch, and he collapsed onto it, holding his arm at an unnatural angle.

Tonks folded her arms. "Are you Ok?" she asked, feeling slightly annoyed at Remus.

He nodded, looking weary and tired. "I will be," he said quietly.

"Now, just _why_ exactly do want to apologise to me?" she asked crossly.

He sighed, and hung his head in shame once more. "Everything," he said again. "I'm sorry about now, for getting myself injured, and you having to risk your life to save me. I'm sorry that I never got to your house in time this morning to warn you, and I'm sorry that I never found you in time to tell you to stay inside," he looked at her. "There are Death Eaters, Tonks, and I never warned you in time! I only just found out later on last night what happened because Arthur sent me a patronus bearing a message. I then got one later on this morning from Molly, saying that she feared the Death Eaters would follow your father back here, and she wanted me to investigate. So I did, and it seems I came just in time to save your father. They're fighting now; Ted and Andromeda, and thankfully there are only two Death Eaters; Dolohov and Bellatrix," he stared at his feet, then looked at her again. "I heard what happened last night. With you and Bellatrix, and then how you got hit in the head with the knockout spell. They said you fought really well, and, Molly said you're lucky, since the damage you received from the spell was very minor," Lupin took Tonks's hand with one of his own. "I was worried about you, Tonks, and you don't know how guilty I feel about leaving the party just before the Death Eaters came. I didn't know if you were dead, or going to die… I was worried. So I went to The Burrow- or what was left of it anyway. They told me that your parents had taken you back to their place, and, for some reason, they suspected the Death Eaters would follow your father to here, and they wanted me to get to your parents place first to warn you," he hung his head in shame. "But, I failed." Lupin sighed, then looked at her.

"How's your arm?" she asked quietly.

He moved it slightly and winced. "Bloody painful," he said with a small smile. "But, I'll be Ok."

She looked at his arm. "We need to get it fixed," she said nodding at it. "I can fix small bones, but the risk would be far too high for me to fix a broken arm," she sat on the coffee table opposite him. "You wait here, I'm going to go help my parents." Tonks made for the door.

"No, w-wait!" he cried. "You aren't in a fit state to fight either, you know."

She smiled at him. "I don't care," she said. "My parents need help, so I am going to do just that."

Just that minute though, her parents crashed through the open door. Her mother's hair, usually kept so immaculate, was unbelievably messy. Ted was standing just behind his wife, with a large bruise around his left eye. Although the unfit state they were in, they both looked triumphant. "We managed to chase them off," her father said with a smile. He looked at Lupin, and his face fell. "What happened to your arm, Remus?" he asked, gaping.

Lupin laughed weakly. "I think I may have been hit by a rogue spell," he said, looking at his broken arm. "And I believe it must have been broken from the impact."

"Oh, dear," Tonks's mother gasped when she saw Remus's arm. "Are you Ok, Remus?" she asked, concerned.

He laughed again, but this time Tonks could see he was putting on a brave face. "I'm fine, honestly, Andromeda," he said, wincing as he moved his arm slightly.

Ted shook his head. "You're not Ok," he said. "We need to get you to Saint Mungo's," he looked at his wife, then at Tonks. Tonks nodded.

"My dad's right," she said quietly, mainly talking to Lupin. "I'll take him," she announced with a small, determined nod.

Remus hung his head back. "I'm fine, honestly," he said, trying his best to persuade Tonks and her family.

Tonks and her family scowled at him.

Lupin hung his head in defeat. "Fine." He sighed unhappily.

Tonks smiled triumphantly. "Ok, then," she said brightly. "Let's get going, Remus; I'm sure the nurses there will fix you up in _no_ time." Tonks looked at her parents."Where's my old broomstick?" she asked. "I'll take that, it will probably be the easiest way to travel; I personally think doing side in apparition is just a little too dangerous," she looked at Lupin with a small concerned smile.

He smiled back. "The broomstick it is then," he agreed.

A few minutes later, Andromeda had put Remus's broken arm in a sling- for more comfort, and the old broomstick had been rediscovered in the guest bedroom cupboard. Lupin and Tonks were ready to go.

Tonks kicked off the ground, and the broom lifted into the air.

She smiled to herself; she was doing exactly what she had wanted to do for months! For once, Tonks was spending time with Remus, without her "bloody annoying" parents bugging her. Although, she thought to herself, they weren't in the greatest situation. She shook herself from her fantasies and focussed on getting Lupin to St Mungos.


	8. Chapter 8: Lupin

**Author's Note: Apologies, this chapter is quite short! Please, still enjoy, though! :) **

CHAPTER 8

LUPIN

The ride on the broomstick seemed to take hours, when in fact it only took little over half an hour. Lupin winced, but had to compliment –in his mind- how good and skilled a rider Tonks was on the broomstick. He cautiously jumped off the broomstick, and held his broken arm with his good one.

They slowly shuffled up the old, cobbled alleyway that the Wizards Hospital was hidden in. Tonks put a reassuring arm around his shoulder- he would not have been surprised if she had done it deliberately.

They walked up to an old weathered wall, and he whispered an old incantation. He must've looked totally crazy, but it was this way that he and Tonks would be able to enter the witches and wizards hospital. Hopefully they would be able to fix his arm, although he had heard from Harry that the pain from growing bones back was excruciating. Thankfully, he hadn't lost the bones in his arm; he had only broken them-badly, too. By the time Remus had stopped daydreaming, a wall had opened up and the hospital doors had appeared.

They didn't have to wait for too long; the hospital was basically empty. The witch who helped them was shocked and wondered, "How he managed to shatter all the bones in his arm". Remus and Nymphadora decided to keep the details down low… Really, really low. It took about an hour to get Lupin's arm fixed, and every time he looked at Tonks, she looked away, looking as though it was her fault that he had broken his arm.

He could not stand the silence for much longer. "Nymphadora…" he began, but was cut short by Tonks

"Remus," she said slowly. "You know how much I _hate _that name," she continued in a surprisingly sweet tone, "so would you _please _STOP USING IT!" she snapped.

Lupin shook his head, stifling a small smile. There was something about Tonks' fiery attitude toward… Certain things that made people really admire her.

She whipped her head around, her back facing Lupin. "Sorry." she muttered.

"What?"

"I'm sorry," she said with a sigh, "about everything. If Molly didn't tell you about, well… y'know, then we wouldn't be here right now, your arm wouldn't have been broken in the first place, and I wouldn't have caused you any pain…" her voice trailed off, and she looked at him again. "Maybe it's best, if I walked out of your life forever, and we never talked or saw each other again." she stood up. So did Lupin.

"No." he said. "You aren't going to leave, and you tried this not too long ago, remember? You're not going to do it again, because it causes you nothing but sadness."

She looked at him, with an unemotional look in her eyes. "I…" she hesitated. "I guess I really need to start making my mind up about things, huh?"

He scowled at her, and nodded.

"But…." she glared at him. "You know what? I have made my mind up, Remus, and, even though I know, _you _will not approve. I chose you, but you don't seem to give a damn about it."

He gaped at her, but before he could talk, she continued.

"I gotta go, Lupin. Molly's invited me to tea, and I don't want to be _rude_ like _some people_." she got up from her seat in the waiting room of the hospital, and left, slamming the door behind her.

Something he noticed after she left, was how quiet everyone in the waiting room was; they were listening to them bickering! Remus felt very ashamed and embarrassed, almost childish.

"_Well." _he thought. _"That went well." _A few minutes later, the nurse called him back, as they were finally going to fix his arm. He rushed to the witch so he didn't have to sit with the people staring at him.

An hour or so later, Remus' arm had been fixed, and he left St. Mungos, going-he hoped-in the opposite direction Tonks had gone a few hours before.


	9. Chapter 9:Tonks

**Authors Note: ****Sorry I haven't updated in a while! Well, here's the next chapter! Please, please review and tell me what you think! I haven't been writing this very often because no-one is reviewing and telling me what they think!**

**Reviews are my motivation, so if you are enjoying this fic, please review!**

**And enjoy! :D **

CHAPTER 9

TONKS

As soon as Tonks was out of range of the witches and wizards hospital, she apparated to the Leaky Cauldron, somewhat looking forward to confiding in Molly the past days' activities. But it wasn't a happy sort.

She sat at the large dining room table, huddled next to the fire, clutching a large mug between her hands. The Weasleys had moved to the Leaky Cauldron, all expenses paid by the Ministry, until they were able to mend the damage inflicted on The Burrow. Tonks felt terrible barging in, not long after they'd lost basically everything, but… Molly insisted, and you don't refuse an offer from Mrs Weasley.

She hesitated. "…I …." Tonks sighed. "I feel terrible, Molly." she said finally.

Molly gave her a sympathetic smile, and allowed her to continue talking.

"I shouldn't have said those things to him… I was _horrible_ to him, Molly, just _horrible_."

Molly turned and sat opposite her. "Well…" she said slowly, carefully considering her words. "Everyone makes mistakes, and…. I know I went through the problem you're going through at the moment, and you know what I did?"

Tonks looked at her quizzically.

"I let the problem fix itself." she replied in a matter-of-fact tone. "I stopped talking to the person who I thought I'd hurt, and eventually we'd forgotten about what'd happened."

"….. Who…" Tonks hesitated. "Who was it? The person you yelled at, I mean."

Molly smiled at her. "Arthur," she replied. "And… after we'd sorted out our argument, we got married." she looked at Tonks. "You see, Tonks," Molly looked at her. "You can't fight who you love, and the sooner Remus realises that, the happier you both will be."

Tonks was about to ask Molly what she meant, but didn't have time, as two very familiar figures appeared in the Leaky Cauldron.

Thankfully, it wasn't Lupin, but Professor Dumbledore, headmaster of Hogwarts, and Harry Potter. She forced a smile.

"Hello Professor," she said, addressing Dumbledore. "Wotcher, Harry."

Harry smiled back. "Hi, Tonks." he replied.

She stood up. "I really should get going,"

"Please, don't leave on my account," Dumbledore insisted. "I was about to leave anyway, I just needed to drop Harry off here."

'No, that's all right, professor, I really need to get going. Thanks for the tea and sympathy, Molly."

"_It helps."_ she added in her head.

"Why don't you come over for dinner in a couple of weeks?" Mrs Weasley asked. "Remus and Alastor are coming-"

"No, that's alright, Molly, I really need to go," she pulled her cloak around her shoulders and hurried past Dumbledore and Harry. She turned before she walked through the door. "thank you, Molly," she said.

"That's quite alright, dear," she replied.

"No." Tonks said. "Truly. Thank you so much."

Dumbledore turned to talk to her. "Nymphadora, I trust you received my owl about patrolling at Hogsmeade station on the first of September, did you not?"

Tonks stifled a scowl. It was only because it was Dumbledore that she didn't snap at him for calling her by her despicable first name. "Er-, yeah, I did sir." she forced a sheepish smile. "I got the owl this morning, and as I'd just been hit by a stupefy curse the night before, I didn't read it properly. I was worried because I thought it was in the next couple of days!"

Dumbledore smiled sympathetically, his blue eyes sparkling through his half-moon spectacles. "Yes," he replied. "Your mother did tell me something about that, and how you mightn't be able to come because of it," Dumbledore looked at her. "She respects your space you know, and I could tell by the way she wrote that she trusted your word that it was in a couple of days."

Tonks was silent. "….I…" she hesitated. "I guess she didn't know that I could barely see then, huh?" she looked around, at Molly, Dumbledore, then only just noticed that Harry had disappeared.

Dumbledore smiled again at her. "So, will you be able to help me, Nymphadora?"

She nodded. "Yeah, I'd love to." she replied, even though, in reality at that exact moment she didn't want to at all. "I guess I better get going then," she said. "Bye, Molly, Dumbledore, sir."

With that, she turned to leave. Instead of apparating, she walked down Diagon Alley, happy to finally be alone with her thoughts at last. She couldn't believe what Dumbledore had said about her mother; it just didn't seem _right_; she was sure her mother was unhappy with her. She quickly forgot about the topic of her mother; there were many questions that she had to answer, more about Lupin and her. She knew that she had to answer them herself but didn't know where to _start_!

Firstly, was Tonks _really_ that depressed that she couldn't use her metamorphic abilities, or was some part of her _making_ her not use them, so she could look more like Lupin?

Then there was the fact that she was always an emotional _wreck_; she had seemed to have grown up a little more, was this because she was, once again, thoroughly miserable, or was she trying to _act_ more mature, so Lupin could see she was actually a responsible person?

Ugh. All this thinking and trying to get herself to answer questions she knew she would never be able to was giving Tonks a headache. She shook her head, as though she was trying to shake the thoughts out of her head.

Instead, she thought about her despicable aunt; Bellatrix Lestrange. Bellatrix, her mother's sister, hated Tonks' family, because her mother, Andromeda, had married a muggle. Therefore, the long line of purebloods that Tonks and her family had descended from had been destroyed. Because of this, Bellatrix had made it her duty to kill Tonks. In her eyes, she hated Tonks as much as Voldemort hated Harry Potter.

It was rather late, so Tonks wasn't surprised that all the shops lining the cobbled street of Diagon Alley were closed. Everyone now feared the fact that Voldemort-Tonks stopped her thought train at this moment-…. _You-know-who_ had returned.

She sighed, hung her head, and focussed on her parents' house. Although it _was_ late, she knew her parents wouldn't mind if they found their guest bedroom in use once more. With that last thought, she disapparated to her parents home.

Tonks had always enjoyed apparating and disapparating, although, she never did actually see the difference between the two of them. She stumbled in the long grass surrounding the house. She looked up to the house, and was surprised-and a little startled- to find the house still lit.

She enjoyed the short walk up to her parents' house. The long grass was the only things her mother had allowed to keep untidy and unkempt. It had taken a lot of persuading from Tonks' father, but her mother soon gave up and agreed. Tonks slowly made her way up the wooden stairs –the house was quite similar to a log cabin: very warm and welcoming-and knocked after a moment's hesitation. To Tonks' surprise, it was her mother who answered the door.

"Nymphadora?" she said, looking very tired and confused.

Tonks looked at the ground momentarily, and nodded. "Yeah, mum. It's me."

Her mother smiled broadly and took Tonks' hand, dragging her into the house.

"Come, sit down," Andromeda insisted. "I'll go get us something to drink."

Tonks sat down at her mothers command, but there was still one question that was niggling at the back of her mind. "Mum?" she asked.

"Yes dear?" her mother called from the kitchen.

"Why are you still awake? It _is_ really late, and I just expected you to be in bed at this hour." Tonks despised herself for saying this; it made her sound too much like her mother.

Her mother backed out of the kitchen, carrying out a tray laden with two mugs with steaming substances.

Tonks was confused by her mother's behaviour; she could've used her wand to transport the tray from the kitchen to the living room, but for some reason, her mother _didn't_.

Tonks shrugged. _"I guess that's what you do when you've been living with a muggle for a husband for a fraction of your life,_" she thought, not giving the unusual behaviour another thought.

Her mother, Tonks only just noticed, had a very distant expression in her eyes.

"Mum," she said, her eyes narrowed, "Are you OK?" she asked.

Tonks knew this was a stupid question. After all her experience as an auror, she knew that her mother most definitely _not OK_. She knew what was wrong with her mother, but she wanted to hear it from _her_ mouth, even though that was impossible. Tonks secretly grasped her wand under her cloak. It was very reassuring having it in her hand; it made her feel like she had a chance of winning and living in some form or another.

Just as Tonks expected, her 'mother' acted as if she didn't know what she was talking about. Andromeda looked her daughter, a confused appearance set on her face. "I-I don't know what you're talking about, Tonks?" she said.

Tonks smirked. "Mum never calls me that," she said, glaring at the imposter. "….unless I get angry at her for using it," she continued. "which is most of the time." she added.

Andromeda continued to look at her, a smile forming on her face.

Tonks ignored it. "So, 'mother,' I have something else to ask you," she said. Tonks, like everybody else in the Wizarding World had received the pamphlet named " Protecting your home and family against dark forces", so she decided to ask Andromeda one of the safety questions. Although, this was one she'd just made up on the spot. "Why, can I not…" she looked at her. "…use my metamorphous abilities any more?" she asked. It was a very personal question; one that only a few people knew the answer to.

Andromeda looked at her, her mouth hanging wide open. "I-I ….." she stammered.

Tonks hesitated for a moment; this person _was_ her mother, she was just under the imperius curse. Tonks had an uncanny suspicion that the person controlling her was in the house. She looked at her mother, and knocked her out using the 'Stupefy' spell. She quickly -being as careful as she could at the same time- lay her mother on the couch and started to search the house. Tonks _knew_ it would be Bellatrix behind the attack, although, she didn't know if it was for the Black family, or Voldemort's orders.

It didn't take long to do a full search of the house, and soon she was at the door of her parents bedroom. She took a deep breath, and slowly swung the door open so she could enter.

"_Lumos." _she muttered under her breath.

As far as she could see, the room was still in the clean, immaculate order that her mother appreciated.

"_The mother I just knocked out,"_ she thought reproachfully.

A woman with a sullen face and wild, black hair appeared out of no-where. The time Bellatrix had served in Azkaban certainly showed on her face.

She was smiling in a wicked, terrifying manner. "They said you would be here," she said, the tone of malice detectable in her voice. "They said that you would probably come back at about midnight…." Bellatrix's voice trailed off, as she mockingly looked at her wrist for a watch. "Would you look at that!" she exclaimed. "Right on schedule."

Tonks continued to say nothing, still glaring at Bellatrix. She eventually found the words she was looking for. "What do you want Bellatrix?" she demanded.

Bellatrix grinned at her. "I suppose you think I'm here to kill you and your family?" she asked.

Tonks gave an involuntary shudder, but eventually nodded. It was true, that was what she was expecting to happen.

Bellatrix laughed at her. "I wish," she said.

At this point, Tonks was surprised that her aunt wasn't mocking her in her baby tone.

"The Dark Lord wants me to recruit my wittle niece to become one of us," she said, obviously not liking the idea at all.

Tonks burst out into laughter. "You've got to be _joking_!" she exclaimed.

"I wish I was," she growled.

"Well, I'm sorry to disappoint you and your precious _Voldemort_, but you won't be seeing me as a death eater, not in your lifetime, at least."

Bellatrix looked like she had just been slapped. She soon recovered, and smirked at Tonks. "The Dark Lord suspected you would say this, so he said, get her to co-operate."

Tonks breathed in sharply

"By any means possible." Bellatrix grinned at her.

Tonks knew what was coming; she braced herself as well as she could.

"CRUCIO!" Bellatrix cried out.

Tonks screamed in pain. She was knocked to the ground because of the strength of the spell.

Bellatrix laughed wickedly. "So, are you going to join us? Or am I going to have to torture you even more?"

Tonks cowered on the floor, he breaths coming in short, sharp gasps. "Why….." she breathed in. "Why does he want me?" she asked, glaring at Bellatrix.

She looked at Tonks. "'Her metamorphic abilities will come into use' that's what he said anyway. He despises the fact that you aren't pure-blood, but he said that your abilities are more important than your blood type," she sneered at her. "I seriously don't see why he wants you; your mother is a traitor, she's made you an outcast too," Bellatrix turned her head to one side. "So, are you going to join us?"

Tonks shook her head. "Never," she said, glaring at her.

Little did Bellatrix know, Tonks had sent her mother's owl-who was one of the fastest she knew-to Alastor Moody. Tonks knew that any moment, he would hopefully arrive with a few of the other aurors. In the mean time, Tonks would have to stall Bellatrix….

"Did you really expect me to join you that easily?" Tonks spat. "I know I've made some pretty stupid choices in life, but I will never fall to the low level of you and the other Death Eaters. By the way, what did you do with my father?" she asked.

"He's safe… for now," she said. "Lucky for him, he hasn't been home yet, so he didn't get killed… this time, anyway."

Tonks breathed a sight of relief. At least her father was safe.

Tonks heard a crash out in the yard, but it didn't go unnoticed by Bellatrix. She glared at Tonks.

"What have you done?" she demanded.

Before she could answer, Bellatrix had her under the cruciatus curse once more. She writhed in pain, wanted it to stop… wanted to die….

"Tonks!" growled a familiar voice.

Tonks was lying face down on the wooden floor in Ted and Andromeda's room. "Moody?" she mumbled.

Before he could answer, Bellatrix attempted to torture her again. Tonks didn't have the energy to retaliate. Her aunt screamed out the incantation, and for the third time in about 10 minutes, she was being tortured.

Moody tried to attack Bellatrix, but she escaped. That's what Tonks was told anyway.

She stayed crumpled on the floor for about ten minutes, not moving.

Mad-eye tried to get her off the floor many times, but eventually gave up, seeing that she was refusing to co-operate.

Eventually, she did stand up, and slowly made her way to the lounge area. She leant on the wall for support. It was Alastor who noticed Tonks first.

She ran her hand along the wall as she continued into the lounge. "Where's mum?" she asked fearfully.

Mad-eye limped over to her, and put a hand on her shoulder. "Andromeda's fine. She's been taken to St. Mungos, and we've told your father what's happened. He's gone to visit your mother."

Tonks nodded. "There wasn't anything I could do!" Tonks exclaimed, her head hung in shame. "Bellatrix took me by surprise, and she was too strong." the young auror looked around to see who else answered the distress call she sent out.

Kingsley and a few of the other aurors had come. Along with Arthur Weasley, and Lupin. Tonks' eyes widened in shock and anger as she saw the familiar, greying face in front of her. Before she could say anything, Alastor continued talking.

"You were very brave," he growled, giving her a sympathetic smile. "I don't think I've seen anyone recover as quickly as you did after being tortured with the cruciatus curse three times in a row."

The corner of Tonks' mouth turned up in a small smile. "Thank you all so much for coming so quickly." she said, looking at Molly, Kingsley, Mad-eye and the other aurors. She didn't bother looking at Lupin, she was too angry at him.

Molly was at her side in a heartbeat, and Tonks found herself resting her head on the older witch's shoulder.

The next few hours went by in a blur. Before she knew it, Ministry of Magic personnel had almost literally blown the front door of its hinges and were questioning everybody in sight. Along with Moody, the wizards who came to question her were very astonished at how well she coped with the cruciatus curse. They asked her many questions: 'How did she know that her mother was under the imperius curse?' 'What did she do to immobilise Andromeda?' Eventually, all Tonks heard was 'blah, blah, blah, mumble, mumble, mumble'. Somehow, Tonks managed to answer all the questions without really thinking about the answers she was giving, and within the next hour, she was sitting huddled under a blanket on the back porch, looking at the stars.

It was Molly who first came to check on Tonks, bringing with her a large mug of her famous hot drinks. Mrs Weasley sat down beside Tonks and put a comforting arm around her shoulder.

Tonks looked at her, then back at the sky. "Why did you come?" she asked.

"I was also with Alastor when he got your owl, and he suggested that maybe it would be good if I came to help comfort you." she replied

Tonks was confused. "'Also'? What do you mean?" she asked. "Who was also with you?"

"Lupin," Molly answered simply, as if there was nothing wrong with it.

"Uh-huh," her heart leapt. "Why was he with you and Mad-Eye?"

"Order Meeting," the witch replied.

Tonks scowled. "Why didn't you tell me?" she asked.

Molly looked at her sympathetically. "We thought you already had too much on your mind, especially since you and some of the aurors are going to be stationed at Hogsmeade station and Hogwarts for the arrival of the students in a few days."

"Mad-Eye's not going then, is he?" she asked, feeling a little disappointed, and, if it was possible, even more down and sad.

Molly shook her head. "I'm afraid not, dear," she said. "He has lots to do at the Ministry, as do many other people."

Tonks sighed. "I'm going to be staying in Hogsmeade for a while, then,"

Molly looked at her. "You're becoming very thin, and you are looking pretty ill," she said unexpectedly. "Is this really all about Remus?" she asked.

Tonks hesitated. "I don't have an appetite any more," she replied, skipping the question about Remus Lupin.

Unfortunately, Molly noticed. "Yes, I understand that dear, but is this _all_ about _him?_" she asked again.

Tonks thought for a moment, and nodded. There was no other explanation about everything that was occurring with Tonks' life. "But…." she said quietly. "A small part is to do with Sirius," she added.

Molly smiled at her. "That's understandable dear," she said.

Mrs Weasley stood up abruptly and went back inside, leaving Tonks on the doorstep wondering: who would come out next?

She took a thoughtful sip of the drink Molly had given her.

All too soon, the door leading to the porch opened once more, but this time, it was Lupin who came through it.

He sat down next to her, and for the first time in days, Tonks was relieved and happy to see him.

"How're you feeling?" he asked quietly.

She smiled weakly at him. "I've been better," she replied, her voice barely a hoarse whisper.

"I'm sorry, that was a stupid question," he said abruptly.

Tonks laughed. "That's alright," she said. "Its nice to know someone's looking out for me."

"Where are you going to stay tonight?" Lupin asked.

Tonks looked at him quizzically. "I guess I'll just stay here,"

"Well…" Remus hesitated momentarily. "I'm still staying at Grimmaud Place; you could stay for the night if you wanted to,"

Tonks nodded. "That would be nice," she said with a smile.

"I mean, if you don't want to stay here by yourself…" his voice trailed off.

Tonks smiled to herself. It was all right. She was safe now.

"But…." she narrowed her eyes in confusion. "What about my parents?" she asked. "I really should go see them, don't you think?"

Lupin sighed. "I was talking to everyone else just after the attack, and they all agreed it would be better if I took you somewhere safe for the night. Especially if Voldemort is on the watch for you," he looked at her. "Sorry, Tonks," he added.

Tonks forced a smile. "That's fine," she said. "It's not your fault, anyway, so you don't need to apologize."

The corner of Lupin's mouth twitched in a small smile. Tonks didn't smile back. Although she was happy to see him, Tonks was still scared out of her mind over the past hour's events.

Tonks closed her eyes and sighed. As much as she hated to admit it, she felt safest with the person who was sitting on the back porch with her. Not Molly, or the Weasleys, not anybody else from the order, not even her _parents_. She trusted him, _a werewolf_, even though they were the most mistrusted creatures in the Wizarding world.

"Tonks."

Someone was calling her, but Tonks didn't want to answer. After a few long seconds, she reluctantly opened her eyes. Surprised to find herself resting her head on a broad shoulder, she looked up. Remus was still there, embracing her with his arm around her shoulder, his chin resting on her head. Was it he who had called her name? Or, had she just imagined it? Had Lupin's body language notified her to open her eyes? Tonks looked around, but couldn't see anything out of the ordinary.

Lupin had noticed that Tonks was looking around.

She gave him a questioning look, and he motioned to take his arm off around her shoulder. She shook her head. "It's nice," she said with a tiny smile. "How long have we been here for?" she asked.

Tonks saw him hesitate before answering her. "…. A couple of hours," he said. "You fell asleep," he added.

That would explain it. Time passing so quickly. "Thank you, Remus," she breathed in his ear.

Remus stood up slowly, holding Tonks' hand and pulling her up with him. The blanket encasing Tonks slid off her shoulders.

"Where's everyone else?" she asked as he led her inside.

"They're still here," he replied, not looking at her. His hand slipped from hers, but Tonks had forgotten they _had_ been holding hands. It had seemed so natural…. Like they were meant to.

They both went inside, and Alastor stood up when he saw them arrive.

"How are the two lovebirds going?" he asked with a mock grin.

Lupin scowled, and moved a few inches away from Tonks.

Tonks blushed, but, trying to hide it, didn't realise Lupin moving away from her.

Alastor turned to Tonks. "We have news," he said. Tonks' eyes widened. "Your father arrived at St. Mungos not too long after your mother arrived," he looked at her-with, surprisingly, both his eyes. "Your mother's fine," he reassured. "She just may be in hospital for a week or so,"

Tonks sniggered slightly. The thought of her mother in an immaculate ward with nothing to do and no one to boss around amused her slightly.

When Mad-Eye hobbled away awkwardly on his uneven legs, Lupin muttered something.

"Sorry, what did you say?" she whispered, edging closer to him.

"I said Mad-Eye's a stupid git," he muttered. "Who should keep his eye out of other people's business." Lupin folded his arms against his chest, obviously unimpressed by the rash comments made by the older auror.

"C'mon," he said, pulling her by the arm. "Let's get out of here."

Tonks allowed herself to get led by Lupin out the front door. No-one questioned where they were going, or protested. They must've already planned that Lupin was going to take her home.


	10. Chapter 10: Lupin

**Author's Note: ****Ok. Hello again! I am sorry I haven't updated in ages, but I was going through this stage where I didn't want to write because I didn't think many people were reading this story. Well….. a couple of readers changed my mind, and have made me realise that it isn't really about the amount of reviews you get, it's more about the people who read the story and really enjoy it. So, thank you to Fanfiction Fan and Hermionehp904 for persuading me to continue to write this story. **

**Hope you enjoy this next chapter! **

CHAPTER 10

LUPIN

Lupin led Tonks to the yard outside her parents' house. Telling her to hold onto him, because they were going to do side on apparition, he focussed his thoughts solely on Grimmaud Place.

They landed well-at least, he did anyway. Tonks, with her clumsiness, managed to fall face first onto the pavement.

"Ouch."

"You Ok?" he asked.

She picked herself up from the ground and brushed herself off. "Yeah, I'm fine," she said with a sheepish grin. "You get used to things like this when you're as clumsy as me."

Lupin couldn't help but smile either.

He frowned to himself. As much as he hated to admit it, he had, in fact started producing feelings for Tonks, and instead of him pushing them away, they seemed to get stronger.

He grabbed Tonks by the wrist and pulled her towards the house that was protruding out from the rest of the block.

They sat at the large table in the cold kitchen together, silently sipping hot chocolate.

"I…. never realised how quiet it was here," Tonks said, breaking the silence between them.

Remus chuckled. "You get used to it," he said.

"How often do you stay here?" she asked.

"I've been moving around quite a lot. So, I do come here quite often."

He looked at Tonks.

"Tonks?" he said, determined to say something about his feelings towards her.

"Yeah?" she said eagerly.

"Er-never mind," he said, defeated.

Tonks looked slightly disappointed. "Oh… Er-Ok, Remus," she said quietly, slightly abashed.

Tonks, who still looked quite uneasy about being in the large house after her last encounter with Bellatrix, let herself be led by Remus into the lounge area, where they both sat on one of the moth-eaten couches.

There they sat, holding tiny shot glasses of fire whiskey, immersed, almost drowning, in the awkward silence between them. He watched as her tense shoulders soon relaxed when she realised she was safe with him.

Lupin suppressed a smile. He liked the fact that she felt safe with him. But then… why wouldn't she be?

She did love him, after all.

After several minutes of silence, Remus spoke. "Are you Ok, Tonks?" he asked for the umpteenth time. It was a stupid question, he knew, but he felt it was necessary that she knew he was there for her.

The witch hesitated for a moment, the answered. "I'm alright," she said quietly, biting her lip. "Just…. Scared."

He looked at her sadly. Then, despite the fact he wanted to banish all feelings for her that he had, he put an arm around her, and kissed her softly on the cheek, causing streaks of her hair to go momentarily pink.

"So, what happened tonight?" he asked, still not knowing the full story.

She was quiet for a few minutes.

"You don't have to tell me," he said hastily. "I don't mean to pry,"

"It's alright," she said. "I was just getting my thoughts together,"

He nodded. "Ok," he said.

"Well, I went to my parents' house, and my mother opened the door," she began. "She was acting strangely, so I asked her a question only she would know…" the explanation took a while, but Remus hung on to every word, paying the utmost attention.

Tonks' voice began to waver. "Bellatrix used the cruciatus curse three times on me," she said quietly.

Remus took her hand in his, and began to rub small circles on it with his fingers. "That must have been scary," he whispered.

She nodded. "I….. I thought I was going to die, Remus," she said, looking at him.

He noticed the tears in her eyes, and pulled her close, wrapping his arms around her.

She relaxed in his embrace, and he slowly pulled her closer.

They didn't speak for another hour. Both thought the other person was asleep, but both Remus and Tonks were awake. He finally broke the silence.

"Tonks," he said quietly. "I'm going to be going away soon,"

She sat up quickly, wincing because of the pain that plagued her whole body. "Why?" she demanded.

He sighed. This was going to be hard. "Well….. Dumbledore has asked me to go undercover," he began.

"Where?" she asked.

"I'm almost literally going underground, to be with _my_ equals," he replied.

Her eyes widened in recognition. "_Werewolves_," she breathed.

He nodded.

She looked at him, but in a way that she almost didn't recognise him. "No," she said, shaking her head. "No, you can't!" she screamed.

Remus held her in his arms, trying to comfort her, which was very hard considering she was trying to fight it. It was when he began stroking her hair lightly that she began to calm down and he could continue talking again.

"Listen, Tonks," he said quietly. "There isn't much I can do for the Order with my condition, and it was Dumbledore who asked me _personally_ for me to do this for him," he looked at her. "I owe a lot to Dumbledore. He gave me somewhere to go as a child, and that was something no-one else had given me. I was able to live semi-normally, have friends and have an education, because of that man. So, I need to do this," he closed his eyes, expecting Tonks to go out on him in a full rage.

But there was nothing, just silence. When he opened his eyes, he saw her, her eyes welling with tears that she was trying to hold back and a small smile on her face.

She nodded. "I understand," she said quietly. "Just…. Promise me you'll come back, and you will stay safe," she leaned closer to him, kissing him lightly on the lips.

He grinned. "I promise,"

Remus kissed her again, but just once. He loved her, he knew that now, but he knew werewolves weren't allowed to find love.

But maybe…. In the near future, he might be the exception.


End file.
